TALES FROM THE SHITTY

Now Who Will Buy My Postcards?

2011-06-15T12:40:00.012-04:00

I am saddened to hear that Kenda the Bear has been put out of her misery just before I was able to get these postcards to market at fArt in the Street this fall.

I'm sure Kenda is looking over all of us Wussies that once stuffed our faces with popcorn and peanuts as we sat watching her pace back and forth eternally in her personal 20 square feet of hell. No doubt she is up there on her heavenly cloud - proud and relieved to finally have made it out of the Worst.

Good for her! Now, if only my handlers would euthanize me...

In her honor, neighboring North High School, whose long-time school mascot has been a Polar Bear - will be changing the team name to the Ted Kennedy Rapists, after Massachusetts' most acquitted senator and organized crime kingpin. I'm looking forward to the next football season, as I've really quite missed seeing the phrase Ted Kennedy High in the news.

South High better watch their asses this season! I smell a lotta drunken rapin' bout to go down

This Is Worcester Massachusetts

2011-05-26T22:40:00.004-04:00

As posted here: http://www1.whdh.com/news/articles/local/worcester-area/12004413977856/gunshots-heard-at-worcester-little-league-field/

WORCESTER, Mass. -- Worcester residents are upset after gunshots were heard near a busy little league field.

It was pure chaos that erupted when shots rang out, according to the president of the Tom Ash Little League.

He says about 100 kids crammed into the snack shack, the bathrooms and the equipment room.

“Down on the floor and close the door and don’t come out until we come back,” said the vice president of the league.

That’s what the vice president of the league told the kids to do.

“They’re crying, they’re yelling…half of them were in there without their parents,” said the vice president of the league.

The games had just finished up. Kids were playing T-ball, baseball and softball. There were girls and boys between the ages of five and twelve.

The vice president of the league says he saw two older kids at the basketball court, who he says were suspicious. He says he is convinced that they were behind the shooting.

“They were going to do what they were going to do and I don’t think anybody was gonna get in their way,” said the vice president of the league.

Police say they were able to locate one person who they believe was the target.

“We were able to make a motor vehicle stop of the potential victim in this incident and he denied all involvement,” said an official.

But investigators say they are not buying it, and they say the person continues to be uncooperative.

“We volunteer to do this, we volunteer to help the kids and that’s not what we signed up for,” said the vice president of the league.

Officials say there has been an increase in violence in Worcester, and in response there will be more paroles on the streets beginning June 1st. But until that happens, there will be no more games played on that field.

Worcester Massachusetts a Great Place To Have Your Kids Shot At

2011-05-24T22:48:00.000-04:00

Shotgun incident empties ballfields at Vernon Hill

(As posted by: Bronislaus B. Kush TELEGRAM & GAZETTE STAFF)

WORCESTER — A man involved in an argument on the basketball court at Vernon Hill Park Sunday night allegedly pulled out a shotgun, sending young baseball players on the field nearby scrambling for cover.

Two city residents were arraigned yesterday on charges that stemmed from the confrontation. No injuries were reported in the incident.

Police said witnesses, including an off-duty police officer playing basketball, saw two men arguing. One man pulled out a shotgun or rifle and threatened the other.

The incident, which occurred about 6 p.m., prompted some people in the area to flee.

Police later stopped a vehicle in which the alleged victim was riding.

Police gathered information from that man, as well as witnesses. One of the witnesses took a picture of the car that the suspect left in that included a partial license plate number.

About 7 p.m., police pulled over a car on Grafton Street, near Franklin Street, in which they believed the suspect was riding.

Police said the driver — Milan Scott, 20, of 26 Yukon St. — told the two officers he had a substantial amount of marijuana in his possession.

They said he pulled out plastic bags — each about the size of a tennis ball — that contained packaged marijuana. Police also confiscated $270 from Mr. Milan.

Mr. Scott and Tiffany Morales, 18, of 58 Vernon St., a passenger in the car, were charged with assault with a dangerous weapon.

Mr. Scott was also charged with possession of a class D substance with intent to distribute.

Both cases were continued in Central District Court until June 15. Mr. Scott was held on $2,000 cash bail.

Platinum Premier - Let's Meet at the Place You Get Beat for Beatin' Your Meat

2011-02-23T12:40:00.007-05:00

Stay classy Wussduh:

Reminds Me of Some Folks I Know

2010-08-20T18:02:00.000-04:00

Rich Parents from The Midnight Show

Watching Worstever Magazine Jerk Itself Off

2010-08-14T20:38:00.006-04:00

Masturbatory Print - there's no other way to call it...

Anyone else notice the WhoaMag tooting it's own genitals this week? I guess the fake magazine confuses "letters to the editor" with self-written garbage about what a great job they're doing.

I wonder how many favors the "magazine" owed Nick's owner to publish these consecutive backhanded advertisements.

Bah - maybe I'm bitter that they ran the "letter" from this Dill ditz instead of the letter I wrote them.

Funny Because It's True

2010-08-13T15:03:00.003-04:00

KEEPING WORCESTER IN THE DARK

2010-08-10T13:56:00.022-04:00

The current edition of WOMAG proves once again to be nothing more than a pile of advertisements stapled together by nepotistic garbage. Either these writers are too lazy to venture outside of their beloved cAnal district or just too lazy to dig beneath clique-thick mediocrity into the true underground scene of Worcester. In either case, this last edition shows same-ole-same gimmicks never get old to the local yokels at 101 Water Street. Glad I'm not the only one to notice this time.

Why is that the only music generating a buzz in local media is so laden with gimmicks? Flock of Asswhipes dressed like clowns, playing 80's metal covers - Jason James, dressed like an asshole playing Setzer rip-offs - and now a bunch of fedora wearing pseudo-hipsters gathering around a piano playing hokey Cole Porter songs shot in sepia.

The latest issue of the Worstever Magazine focused on the latter, which they audaciously say, "is reviving a slice of musical history, reshaping club culture and transforming the music scene in a stylish and intellectual manner that underscores the diversity and depth of worcester's new culture climate."

Wow, I had to read that line of shit twice. This "story" reads more like a grant application than a piece of journalism. Particularly when the thinly disguised Nick's ad goes on to say, "an eclectic mix of artists, writers and city intelligentsia, the human elements that form worcester's unique cultural aesthetic." COME ON! "City Intelligentsia?" How pretentious can this writer get? Moreover, how downright phony!? City intelligentsia - get the fuck outta here. This writer Martin is lucky that this town's true intellectual elite moved outta Worcester thirty years ago...

First and foremost, in terms of "reviving a slice of musical history" the costume clowns are doing only what countless other jazz artists have been doing since the music was written in Real Books back in the 70s. The only difference here (which is hardly unique at all) is that the particular group of musicians rely on costumes and toned photography to sell their show instead of musicianship. Maybe this is what WoMag meant by "stylish" and "intellectual". But as far as this costume party "underscoring the diversity and depth of Worcester's new culture climate," that's a stretch of the imagination difficult to reach even for the most creative grant writers around.

There is absolutely nothing culturally diverse or new about playing Cole Porter music whatsoever. This goes well beyond the fact that Porter himself was knocking off black music of his time and making it sellable to whitey or that his rich kid biography falls very short of the real historical essence of jazz in America. No, this has to do with the fact that countless other jazz artists throughout Worcester have been jamming the American Songbook since the songs have been published. Furthermore, there are countless other Worcester venues besides Nick's that have been supporting these artists for just as long.

So why the giant cover story and photo shoot centered around Nick's and the handful of musician's there (one of which writes for the WoMag, surprise surprise...)? What about Luciano's in Union Station, Dzian Gallery, Gilrein's, the Ecotarium, VIA, Val's in Holden, or even Bergson's 1790 in Westborough. ALL of these places have live jazz music regularly. What about the real local jazz musicians that have been laboriously exerting their efforts around Worcester for decades earning very little limelight or even livable wages? Why aren't guys like Joe D'Angelo, Richie Falco, Lou Borelli, or Clyde Wheatley even mentioned?

Is it because these venues aren't booking their writers as PR reps? Is it because these clubs aren't applying for the Creative Economy Initiative grant money? Maybe it's because these musicians aren't on staff at the WoMag? Maybe it's because they aren't donned in full costume and there's not enough gimmick involved to make the sale?

My guess is that this would require a little researching on the writer's part. A few phone calls to local venues or WICN and some venturing outside of their own street would have been too much work for the old WoMag. Instead of putting together some solid copy on the persevering jazz scene that's been grinding it out here in town against all the odds for so many years, or the multiple venues that support this brand of culture that has been steadily fading from the scene - we get another humdrum advertisement for the bar down the street from the paper.

No matter how many facelifts or staff changes this rag undergoes, nepotism and payola still reign supreme at 101 Water Street. If I wanted a stapled pile of crudely created advertisements, I'd just subscribe to the Pulse. I guess I'm the only one to blame for occasionally picking this pile of ads up from off the street and bringing it home, mistaking it for local journalism.

Strangers With CANDI

2010-08-05T17:11:00.011-04:00

Hey kids, you want some candi? Step into my van...

The audaciously named Child and Adolescent Neuro-Development Initiative (CANDI) has been spotted perusing the neighborhoods in search of young minds to play with. Keep your children indoors where they are safe from any eugenics initiatives that were born of 2004's New Freedom Commission on Mental Health .

You remember that commission right? It pushes psychotropic drugs to the kiddies through mandatory "mental health" screenings set-up in schools.

Sound good?

Well consider that we have no clue as per the long-term side effects that these drugs have on children whose brains are still developing. Some adverse side-effects are already evident, yet parents have been threatened with child-abuse charges if they refuse to drug their kids. And seeing as how diagnoses of most of these childhood "disorders" are extremely subjective, you have to wonder if kids will be singled out simply for having philosophical or political views that are unfashionable.

One thing we do know for sure, medical science has yet to even identify every possible brain chemical yet it seems okay for these pharmaceutical companies and their psycho-goons to experiment with altering the minds of developing children.

Teach your children the important safety measure of never taking candi from strangers.

More on Worcester Zoning Corruption

2010-08-02T18:33:00.005-04:00

Attached is a letter Damien Jacob wrote to the ZBA. It was sent with most of the articles published and all the petitions. He did this, because he wanted the Judge in Land Court who decides these cases to have a little recreational reading and so they can see the dynamic and history of this situation, plus how the City has no idea about aesthetics.

To Zoning Board of Appeals, Planning Dept. City Administration, and the rest of City Hall -

Attached is a collection of public articles and documents covering the history of Worcester Sign Company founders and the City of Worcester Zoning Board and City Hall. If you haven’t noticed already; I take my business very personally. The following letter is heartfelt, but I do not expect you to be moved, however I do expect it to be included as part of the record. I focus on the past, because I do not want history to repeat itself. I also want this Zoning Board to realize the “Cause and Effect” that occurs when someone attempts to hinder or prevent people engaged in a legitimate pursuit. In Worcester, since 2006 there has been a tremendous and irretrievable loss of speech. City Hall has underestimated how serious we are about signs… but that is because you literally ignored all the signs.

The First Encounter
In 2006 my business partner, Hewan Small and myself along with our landlord came before David George and the Zoning Board with trusting hearts, humble heads, a polite demeanor, and a desire to live the American Dream in Worcester. We witnessed the ZBA unanimously approve a freestanding double-sided billboard with a cylindrical pole which occupied more cubic feet than our wallscape occupied square feet. In addition the double sided freestanding billboard approved by the ZBA consisted of two 672 sq. ft. sign faces totaling more than 1300 sq. ft. We were applying for a 350 sq. ft. vinyl banner wallscape which is certainly a fraction of the size of the freestanding billboard. We were told we needed a variance for our vinyl banner wallscape, and obviously nobody wanted to “play along to get along” with us. So today we are taking a different approach when dealing with City Hall and the Zoning Board.

In 2006 we prepared extensive visuals and went through several continuances and jumped through many hoops In order to cater to Zoning Board members. We put a lot of effort into the Chandler Street Wallscape and we dragged our landlord to every hearing over the course of 3 months.

The Zoning Board denied our permit for Chandler Street in 2006, we filed a Pro Se lawsuit in response, but the judge dismissed our case because “Corporations need to be represented by an attorney in Court”. We lost that case because we are not lawyers, but we hung a sign - because we are a sign company and that is what we are here to do. Even though we let City Hall know we would return, our message went unheeded, otherwise City Hall would have actually drafted new sign code in the interim years between then and now. The City had plenty of time to plan!

Second Time Around
On March 1st, 2010 we quietly listened to hours of Zoning Board Member comments, none of which were founded in fact or the law and some of which was offensive to me and painful to hear. The reasons the Zoning Board members gave for denying our permits on March 1st were not based on community testimony or the zoning Code, but rather personal opinions of ZBA members which do NOT represent the views or desires of Worcester Constituents other than perhaps Commerce Bank who ironically is the most prolific independent freestanding billboard advertiser in Worcester County. If the Zoning Board and City Administration only serves Commerce Bank, than that is one reason why the majority of Worcester Businesses, property owners, and citizens are unhappy with the current state of affairs. Worcester’s economy cannot be blamed on the National economy, because Worcester had problems well before this recession. I believe there is a systemic issue within City Hall which is responsible for the current situation this City is in.

Attempted Moratorium
The attempted Moratorium, I feel was an effort to destroy Worcester Sign Company. For years, Hewan and I have been developing relationships with property owners in Worcester and I made it clear to the Planning Dept. that there are other locations soon to follow after March 1st, 2010 hearing. The Moratorium failed because it was founded on wrongs and not rights!

The billboard industry is notoriously corrupt with conglomerate companies commonly bribing city officials. For example, In Pittsburgh, PA a sign moratorium was established at the request of the citizens, because city officials had accepted improper gifts in exchange for giving a 1200 sq. ft. digital billboard to a billboard company. In the case with Worcester, the sign moratorium was proposed by elected officials, but opposed by the community and this leaves questions as to WHY? In Los Angeles there was a Moratorium for new Billboards and Supergraphics, but before establishing the Moratorium, the City of LA had struck a deal with 3 billboard companies allowing them to build 800 digital billboards. Since then L.A. has been in federal court, they have redone their sign code several times, removed their original City Solicitor, a Federal Judge voided the digital billboard deal with those 3 companies and during the fiasco a Federal Judge even held the City of L.A. in contempt of Court when the City cited the companies who placed the vinyl building wraps or supergraphics on buildings. Eventually The City of L.A. learned how to create proper sign code, and they are finally gaining control over the mess they made for themselves, but it was an expensive and humiliating experience for the City of L.A. and there was undoubtedly corruption involved. At the end of the day, L.A. discovered some communities want the signs, but some don’t and now instead of City officials serving themselves and their billboard cronies, they are actually listening to see what the community desires.

The City of Worcester chooses not to learn from the mistakes of other Cities, but rather opts to mimic or repeat them. This confuses me, because it is a waste of precious taxpayer dollars that Worcester cannot irresponsibly spare.

It was insinuated that the lack of visuals and pictures presented to the Zoning Board on March 1st, 2010 was an attempt by Worcester Sign Company to hide or deceive the ZBA in regard to the appearance and size of our Wallscapes. That was an insult to our integrity. Worcester Sign Company has nothing to hide! Why would we need to deceive, when what we are applying for is permitted? It is crazy to think that someone would try to hide a 1200 square foot wallscape from City Officials when the wallscape is across the street from City Hall. We were also repeatedly accused of trying to get our signs “in under the wire” before the “new sign code”
came out… On March 1st, 2010 the least of my concerns was a new sign code. It is difficult to create constitutionally compliant code that all users or “speakers” will be content with. On March 1st, 2010 nobody had even seen a rough draft of the proposed sign code, but in particular the Zoning Board had not seen it, however the ZBA was more than willing to blindly accept it as gospel at the detriment of Worcester Sign Company.

On July 12, 2010 it was decided to continue the Hearing to Aug. 2nd, 2010. I was unaware that exhibits needed to be delivered to the ZBA at least one week prior to the Hearing Date, since I would always receive the Planning Dept. Recommendations the Friday before the Hearing, but this is another example of City Hall’s “do what I say, not what I do” policy. I am also confused because, after 6 denials for special permits I know the Zoning Board ignores and disregards our document exhibits and testimony… This letter, is sent on Monday July 26th, 2010 exactly 7 days before the Aug. 2nd 2010 ZBA Hearing which is sufficient time to read this letter.

The Proposed Sign Code
There are so many things wrong with the Proposed sign code, but I leave you with two simple questions, so that you may come up with your own conclusions and perhaps you can tell me what is going on in City Hall:

Why are the large billboard companies getting the Digital billboards they asked for? Thus, being written into the code, while everyone else is being written out.

Who is the current and proposed sign code intended for - Wall Street Conglomerates or Main Street businesses?

The fact that “To provide equal treatment of all parties involved in the regulation and posting of signs….” was erased from the Sign Code and then subsequently justified by City Hall as too “cumbersome” to include is beyond comprehension for me, when the proposed sign code is 116 pages long. This speaks volumes.

The exhibits citing to the proposed sign code is an opportunity for the ZBA to contribute to the Sign Code Drafting process and to accept those documents as “Findings” which could then be communicated to the Planning Board.

Future
The future is for those who plan for it! For four and a half years Worcester Sign Company has been planning - City Hall has not. Worcester Sign Company is poised to create jobs and bring revenue directly into the hands of Worcester property owners and businesses. Worcester Sign Company is here to provide a service to the business community and contribute to the free flow of information for the benefit of Worcester consumers.

The marketplace decides who fails and who succeeds and the “invisible hand” of free enterprise determines the future - not bureaucrats who want to pick and choose who gets what! I don’t know what kind of gratification Zoning Board Members derive from attempting to kill our careers and those who we would employ, but in my opinion it is a sad disservice, and this is no way for the Zoning Board conduct itself.

If Worcester does not look like Worcester in a year from now it is because buildings are being torn down rather than being refurbished… Pretty soon there won’t be many buildings left to hang signs on. The way the Proposed Sign Code is written and the overburdening tax rate imposed on commercial property owners who all have the majority of their buildings vacant is creating a situation where freestanding billboards and parking lots are the only viable option for land owners.

At this point, how am I expected to respect those who have shown us none in return? Respect is reciprocal - when the Zoning Board doesn’t follow their own laws, respect our rights, or the money we spend, or the time of our attorney or landlords?

Believe it or not, I feel I am using a lot of discretion in this letter… But the lesson David George and this Zoning Board should realize is: YOU DO NOT HAVE UNBRIDLED DISCRETION! The Zoning Board is meant to serve Citizens - not egos!

Damien Jacob
Worcester Sign Company, Llc
damien@worcestersigns.com
www.WorcesterSigns.com
617-335-9818 (p)

The Fraud of "Transparency" in the Government - How the Freedom of Information Act Only Works Against You

2010-07-29T12:27:00.017-04:00

Out of what seems to be pure bureaucratic boredom, the zoning commission is moving to prohibit electronic digital signage in town. Worcester Sign Company's Jacob Damien is understandably upset. He believes the city manager is making back door deals with regard to zoning for electronic signs. In protest, Mr. Jacob Damien attempted to exercise his rights in accordance with the FOIA to investigate the matter and has made a request for the city manager's cell phone calls.

Here's how that went:

-----Original Message-----
From: Andreoli, Christina [mailto:AndreoliC@worcesterma.gov]
Sent: Wednesday, July 07, 2010 8:22 PM
To: damien@worcestersigns.com
Subject: Freedom of Information Act Request

Mr. Jacob:
Sorry for my delay. I'm not trying to being difficult and I would like to assist with your requests. If you provide detail on the issues you mention, we will look into it or you may seek legal recourse by filing a claim through the city clerk to the law department.

With regard to your public records requests, the requirements of the Public Records Law are what they are. For example, the Public Records Law prohibits the release of the home telephone number of city employees. Therefore, the telephone log you request must be reviewed for that purpose and the home telephone numbers redacted. Once these documents are reviewed, you could also come in to review the records under supervision if you'd like, which would lower the cost. Otherwise, we will proceed upon receipt of your payment.

Thank you.
Christina

-----Original Message-----
From: Damien Jacob [mailto:damien@worcestersigns.com]
Sent: Monday, July 19, 2010 9:08 AM
To: 'Andreoli, Christina'
Subject: RE: Freedom of Information Act Request

Hello Christina,

I have no objections, if you need to redact telephone numbers of City Employees, so long as the employee's whose number is redacted is identified and the remaining information such as the time and date remain intact. The reason being that the phone number is the identifying element, but if you identify the party by name, then the actual phone number is not necessary.

I can come in to review the records or pick them up, whichever is more convenient for you.

If you are in agreement to provide the Identification of the party whose number is redacted, then I will proceed with payment.

Thank You,

Damien

----- Forwarded message from damien@worcestersigns.com -----
Date: Sun, 25 Jul 2010 15:13:27 -0400
From: Damien Jacob
Reply-To: damien@worcestersigns.com
Subject: FW: Freedom of Information Act Request
To: "'Andreoli, Christina'"

Hello Christina,

I write to you to emphasize my desire to acquire the City Managers Feb. 2010 phone records. I understand that I have been sporadic with my emails, however you have shown to be responsive and I hope that this FOIR can be resolved within the near future.

If you agree to identify, by name, the phone numbers of those who you
redacted, then I will promptly pay the $715.

Thank you,

Damien

Notice how the exchange ends with the city charging Mr Jacob $715 for a copy of a phone bill that will undoubtedly be "blacked-out"...

1-800 Eat My Ass

2010-07-22T22:14:00.004-04:00

I think Worstever could use a little excitement in it's local government to shake things up. Something to keep Jeremy Sulking from putting us to sleep each week with that worstarea column.

We need a councilor the caliper of New Prague's Ken Betterton! Since he's not running for reelection in the fall, perhaps one of the O'Brien brothers can persuade Mr. Betteron to "Show people who are in a position of authority how to use their power for the collective common good" here in Wusstah...

stay tuned Shulkster

Of Course She's Smiling

2010-07-04T12:49:00.002-04:00

For Lease

2010-06-21T15:46:00.003-04:00

Oldy, but still relevant:

The Real

2010-06-16T15:31:00.010-04:00

Every once in a while, I gotta throw the Worstever a bone. I mean, it's not like I haven't said it before anyway - THERE IS REAL TALENT in the Wuss buried under all the bullshit the Womag, Pulse, Weekend Ends Here and other local toilet papers flash in your face.

Check out this video shot by local talent, Nick Cangello. In my opinion, this is hands down the best local production I've seen in...possibly forever. I mean this photographer actually made Worcester look like a real city and everything. Not an easy task by any means.

And why EtheReal remains one of wusstah's most underrated talents is beyond me. This cat's talent far surpasses most other emcees - on a WORLDWIDE level, never mind local. Also, peep Arablak for some gritty original sounds. Keep your eye on the Kinda Dusty/ Social Light Sounds crew and support the shows and merch while you can still afford it. I mean, by this point, if you haven't caught on yet, you're not either not checking the proper sources or hey, maybe hip-hop just ain't your thing...

E The Real feat. Louie Gonz - The Network Game (Official Music Video) from Nick Cangello on Vimeo.

User Friendly Receptacles of Shit

2010-06-12T13:19:00.002-04:00

Okay, so we've all heard the cliché stories about a woman whose boyfriend or husband slaps her around, blatantly cheats on her, and consistently rips apart her self-esteem. While these stories bother us, the most frustrating thing is that somehow these women tend to make excuses for their men and stick-around only to be beaten and abused time and time again. As a friend, or even a bystander - the objective party looking in on the situation tries and tries to convince the woman to leave the man - that she deserves better. It's most often a futile attempt - because let's face it, women who attach themselves to these situations are usually following some unconscious pattern of thinking stemming all the way back to childhood daddy issues. As friends, we try to be supportive and offer advice, but how long can you waste your breath and subject yourself to the ignorant venting of a person with very little common-sense.

Here in Worstever, there seems to be a unique twist to this all too common scenario that's been annoying me as of late. Perhaps, it's just the pendulum swinging back in it's opposite direction, or perhaps it just happens to be a serious lack of common-sense and self-esteem in the particular group of men I grew up with - whatever it is, one thing I know for sure is it's just downright pathetic to witness. I'm talking about grown men, with skills and talent - throwing away every possible opportunity they have to better themselves, due to their misunderstood, misconceived concepts of what they think love is. I'm not talking about a man being "pussy-whipped" by some hot woman who uses her sexual prowess to lure and hold a man as a slave either. That's a separate issue seemingly easier to understand.

No, what I'm talking about is more akin to men acting like straight Cabrons, knowing their wives are whoring around, leeching their money all along, and still somehow lacking the self-esteem, courage, and wherewithal to kick the woman out of their lives. Men who, like battered women, make every excuse in the world why their wife or girlfriend does what they do - and justifying it with a warped idea of what love is.

Friends of men like these typically go through a roller-coaster of sympathy, advice, and frustration. Feeling bad for a friend only lasts so long, then it's time to offer some unbiased, objective advice. Of course when the friend refuses to take the advice and circles around in familiar, self-defeating patterns - how long before one loses patience and just drops the friend out of sheer frustration? I mean, with each of us dealing with our own daily obstacles and stresses, who has time to watch some idiot ignore good reason and chase their tale around in circles?

Case in point: Jack and Kathleen
Jack is a 5'1, zit-faced man who's mother abused alcohol while he was in utero causing fetal alcohol syndrome that resulted in him being born with one leg slightly larger than the other. Growing up, he had plenty of friends, but he was the whipping-boy of the group, always the center of jokes. All of this, combined with his extremely poor hygiene and utter disregard for being clean-cut in any way helped pave the way for a severe lack of self-esteem. However, his personal interest in technology and computer science coupled with his intellectual aptitude to forge an unrefined skill in the field of computers make it obvious he has a natural gift to work with computers, but his lack of self-esteem and talent for making excuses for himself, kept him far from pursuing the field academically or professionally which led him to work along side of high-school children as a cashier at a fruit-stand. Satisfied with a salary barely above minimum wage, and being bossed around and shit on by kids half his age were something easy to adapt to given his past.

Somewhere in the midst of landing the shitty fruit-stand job, Jack hooked up and impregnated Kathleen -a 250 pound unemployed half-wit with a 7 year old boy from a previous relationship. Kathleen lived at home with her parents where she slept all day long and got up each night to wash down a script of painkillers with Boone's malt liquor. Once she became pregnant with Jack's daughter, he moved in and blended with her family there that took care of her - a family similar to the cast of The Devil's Rejects.

Jack continued to work 10 hour days, walking five miles to and from work daily for a couple hundred dollars a week while Kathleen rolled around in bed munching up painkillers like fruit snacks. She had several overdose situations and was put in a mental institution once, was threatened to lose her kids by DSS once, and had several other like adventures - all while Jack worked hard with his handicapped leg to support her habits. Eventually, he too was munching painkillers daily and the two of them maintained a pretty expensive cigarette habit.

One day, in the middle of his ten hour shift, Jack received a call that Kathleen overdosed on Flexeril and was rushed to the hospital. Because she was supposed to be caring for the two children when this happened, DSS got involved. Jack had to leave work early that day to go care for the kids and make arrangements for them to be watched while he slaved at the fruit stand. Kathleen's family took the opportunity to take full advantage of charging to help Jack out - all the while being deadbeats themselves - using his food stamps to eat off, his paycheck to pay bills and rent, and his labor to help fix things around the house. Anybody with the slightest knowledge of what was transpiring could see that Jack was being completely used and abused and on top of that risked losing his daughter all because of Kathleen's apathetic ineptitude. Jack himself cried the blues constantly, playing the self-pity card, desperately acting as if he wanted out.

That's where I came in. I made some calls, spoke to some people and vouched for Jack on all aspects. I found a friend willing to put him up for a while, dirt cheap, right near his job. I offered to help him watch his daughter while he worked until he could find a suitable alternative. The process took a little time, but it was falling into place. Then suddenly, Jack stopped returning phone calls.

After weeks of trying to reach him, I contacted Kathleen and explained that it was urgent I find him, explaining all that was going on. She was furious. Turned out she knew nothing about me trying to find him a way out. I thought they spoke about this all along. Come to find out, he was a coward and a liar - to both Kathleen and I. I made the humiliating call to the guy I vouched to for Jack and explained that he wouldn't be moving in after all. About a week later I got an email from Jack apologizing for everything, telling me, "Sorry man, I Love her. I don't know why, but I do." I decided at that point to write Jack off as an idiot and an asshole, self-esteem issues or not and I cut him off from my life and immediately stopped contacting him.

Case two: Alex and Kara
Alex is a tall lanky man who grew up abused by his family and made to think he was stupid and worthless. Growing up he was often homeless and most contact with his real family resulted in them swindling him out of large sums of money or automobiles. Alex grew up extremely anti-social and lacked many people skills. His mechanical skill and work-ethic more than made up for it though, and he developed a sense of pride for the amount of hours he worked and the weekly paycheck her earned.

Somewhere along the lines, Alex met Kara and they were married. Kara was much more out-going and personable than Alex. She ran the household and handled paying the bills and all other household business. Alex pretty much worked around the clock and when he wasn't working, he'd shut himself in playing computer games, another skill he excelled at.

As time passed, it became clear that Kara was fooling around on Alex. It has been said that she had boyfriends and girlfriends alike. Alex and Kara had their marital issues, but co-dependency seemed to keep them together. Alex needed Kara for a sense of family and love, and Kara needed Alex to pay her fun budget and fund her recreational drug usage.

Then Alex began getting calls from the landlord. The rent was many months behind. He was facing eviction. Next the electricity was shut down for non-payment. Kara began coming home less and less. All this time, she was supposed to have been paying the rent and the utilities, but apparently was blowing the money on her own personal entertainment. Alex was distraught - talking suicidal. He called up in near tears for advice.

Again, that's where I came in. I made some calls, spoke to some people and vouched for Alex on all aspects. He was perhaps the hardest working man I ever knew and I felt sympathy because life always seemed to shit on him in spite of his work ethic. He certainly wasn't lazy and apathetic with his goals the way Jack proved to be. I found another friend willing share his apartment with Alex for a very reasonable rate - even allowing him to keep his beloved cat. Then came the hang-up. My friend only had room for one, and for some reason I've yet to comprehend - Alex refused to move-in if Kara wasn't allowed to come too!

This blew my mind completely. Kara had recently advertised a big "Going Away Party" on Facebook and was supposedly moving out west with her current boyfriend. She had just stolen the last of Alex's paycheck because she had access to his bank account. Somehow, plans with her new boyfriend weren't working out and so now she went back to Alex for help and he actually fell for it!

He gave up the opportunity to move into a decent place where he could begin controlling his own finances and get ahead, all to help out the woman who completely fucked him over. I knew at that point I wanted nothing more to do with hearing the drama of any other relationships again.

I concluded that people are oblivious and totally pathetic when it comes to making themselves into user friendly receptacles of shit.

What really drove this point home was when I received a call from Kathleen the other night. I never speak to the beast, as I hate everything about her - particularly how she's brainwashed my old friend into losing his ball sack completely. She had the gall to text me, cowardly hinting around to see if I would give her a ride to Kara's big going away party (a party which obviously had no merit since she certainly wasn't going away anywhere anyway!) I told her to fuck off in so many words. That's when she responded that she was able to use Alex for a ride anyways.

In other words, Alex chauffeured guests to his wife's pseudo-Going Away party that he wasn't even invited to . He did this on the very night that he was supposed to move out of his shitty situation and into a safe apartment away from the drama where he could start rebuilding his life.

I've heard it said before that God only helps those that help themselves. From now on, when it comes to these user friendly receptacles of shit - I'm following God's lead.

Face it Worsta

2010-06-11T10:00:00.002-04:00

Wustah, MA is just like any other third-rate city in lower-class America in many ways. It's a place that continually tries very hard to prove to the world it's a "special" kind of place to live, with lots of "diversity" and unique culture.

In the Wuss, identity crisis is part of the heritage. From the nightmarish Puritanical history right on through to current times, the local yokels have always had a talent for making themselves out to be heroes in their own minds. Some say Big fish/small pond syndrome. I say, Worstever is more like a puddle - a puddle that their delusions of grandeur somehow transformed into a thriving, up-and-coming "city on the move" in their minds. Hey, life is what you make it I guess.

But often times, many of these "self-importants" will stretch the truth and say things like,, "Hey, we're New England's Second Largest City" completely ignoring three important truths:

1. Being second place in any contest is really nothing worth coining as your city anthem.

2. Providence, RI is actually the second largest city in New England.

and of course, most importantly of course -

3. Who the fuck really gives a shit about New England anyways?

That being said, I think the underbelly of this shitty little village is where the real charm is. And it grows wild like mold. It's these little spores, the shit-talking, joke-making, finger pointing negative assholes that are the real gems here in Wahtown. While others are doing back flips and waving their wusta pompons, these are the crew that flip the bird and wave their hatred with pride.

This ditty is dedicated to those folks. The assholes who truly know -how to Celebrate the Hate.

If life really is what you make it, I say make it fun - and make fun of it often.

Anonymity Itches the Ass of Ranting Randell Again

2010-06-08T16:22:00.008-04:00

If you live in the Wuss and you've been missing the Worcester Wonderland blog - you're in the fog. It's hands-down, one of the most entertaining local blogs worth reading.

Read WWW's latest blog titled Bill Randell: Fool, Hypocrite, or Un-American?
Read through the comment section for some pertinent points.

Anon hits it right on the head when he says, "I think posting anonymously puts emphasis on what you're saying, not who's saying it. That is just an unnecessary distraction and only serves to inflate your reputation with a suggested form of surrogate proof based on it, rather than focus on the issue at hand."

I've always believed anonymity helps keep the focus on the issue being discussed, rather than the character of the individual speaking. I thought it was just the Big Asshole in me, but it's a load off to see others appreciate this as well.

Look at that Wusstarite forum for example. Often times you'll see things like:

A: I don't like low income housing.
B: I think it's necessary.
A: You're a liberal cock-sucker.
B: No, but consider the needs of the less fortunate.
A: Your girlfriend Amy is a whore.
B: Your getting off subject here, and leave my girl out of this.
A: It's not my fault your poor darky!
B: Can we talk about housing?
A: Be a man and come see me in person bitch. I'll tell you all about it darky. Matter of fact, come to my Nola Fest if you got the balls!

You see what I mean?

Now, I've been called cowardly for not publishing my name next to my every thought, but here's the thing - many people read my blog who know me in "real life" and know my pseudonym. It's the readers of my blog who don't know me in real life that seem to get the most upset that they don't know my real name. I just can't see how this is relevant information. If we don't know each other in real life, maybe it's because I don't really want to know you.

How would it really benefit a chub like Randell if I commented, "Hi, My name is Michael Diamond, we don't really know each other outside of the blogosphere, but from what I can tell you seem to be a polyp on the colon of this town."

Would that suddenly make me a courageous guy? Would I be challenged to a duel? I've been slapped with the velvet glove before you know...

tha fuck?

The New Wustah Zubaz Pant

2010-06-04T10:05:00.010-04:00

Redesigned for a bolder look, The New Wustah Zubaz Pant* features bigger pockets, articulated buldge stitching, and an official Worstever embroidered emblem. $19.99 with fill-up from any Gulf Station or get a 15% discount when you ask Walt for Wildroot...

*patent pending (C) MR2010

B-Holla WWW-Edition also available with built in horse-shit smell

Drug'em Up

2010-04-28T01:28:00.000-04:00

In a world where so much hoopla goes into banning beer and cigarette advertisements (and rightly so) it's ironic that we are bombarded CONSTANTLY with pharmaceutical ads all day long.

For quite a while now upon signing out of hotmail, when redirected to the MSN homepage, a very disturbing pop-up ad for Intuniv is flashed in my face. Intuniv is a creation of Shire, a company hell-bent on drugging the youth of America and beyond.

As one reader put it, Shire's philosophy on children is straight and to the point: "Drug them up real good while they're young, and they'll be nice and quiet. Because your time at home should peaceful, even after making that big step into parenthood. "

The Intuniv website is littered with info about how the drug is great for making mindless drones. Take these examples for instance:

" INTUNIV can slow thinking and motor skills."

"Brandon is still an average 10-year-old boy, but when confronted with problems, he is learning to accept our input and to redirect himself without an argument. Our family feels like a family!"

"Symptoms of ADHD may include being easily distracted,... arguing with adults,..."

"Behaviors such as temper outbursts and arguing with adults are associated with ADHD."

Serious possible side effects of INTUNIV include low blood pressure, low heart rate, fainting, sleepiness, tiredness, and drowsiness. The most common side effects of INTUNIV in clinical studies included sleepiness, drowsiness, low blood pressure, headache, nausea, stomach pain, dry mouth, dizziness, irritability, constipation, and decreased appetite.

The presentation of these ads are just as bad if not worse than your average beer or cigarette commercial. The particular pop-up ad that influenced this blog entry portrayed a young boy as a monster for having "symptoms" that every normal young person should have! The ad send the message that your life as a parent can be much easier if you drug your child into a sleepy, lackadaisical mind-state.

These constant bombardments of advertisements urging us to drug the soul out of our kids are an indicator of where we are headed as a society of junkies.

Get on board and take a stand against this kind of brainwashing and petition against this brand of pseudoscience brought to you by the pharmaceutical company marketing departments that create diseases and treatments on a daily basis. Do it for the mental health of society as a whole.

Links:
http://democracyinaction.org/dia/organizations/commercialalert/campaign.jsp?campaign_KEY=1415&t=stop_drug_ads_home.dwt

http://www.commercialalert.org/issues/health/drug-marketing

Postcards From Worchester

2010-04-23T18:41:00.001-04:00

I found this brand of truth quite hilarious...

It Ain't Funny

2010-03-24T09:11:00.000-04:00

Massachusetts Department of Correction's Murder Psychiatric Patient

2010-03-10T13:42:00.005-05:00

A very disturbing article was published on the Boston.com site today.

As upsetting as a story like this is, it is worth sharing because it illustrates the State's brutal disregard for patient/inmate well-being and an overall ignorance of compassion, not to mention what appears to be a ruthless contempt for humanity all together. The phrase, "above the law" seems more and more to be a code of conduct for police and correctional officers, nationwide.

In response to this incident, Bridgewater State 's spokeswoman Diane Wiffin reported to the media, “There is no indication that there was any excessive force at this time.’’

That's even though the death certificate ruled the 23 year old boy died of “blunt impact of head and compression of the chest," which most obviously occurred while being restrained by guards. He was after all, "brought to the emergency room of Brockton Hospital May 4 in cardiac arrest, with a bruise on his forehead and cheek; dried blood on his nostrils and in his hair; ligature marks or indentations on his neck, wrists, and ankles; and a scrape on his eyebrows."

The president of the Massachusetts Correction Officers Federated Union, Steve Kenneway, said he heard that Messier assaulted two officers and that other officers then helped subdue him. As if that somehow discounts or excuses the fact that the psych patient was restrained and then beaten to death by over zealous correctional officers.

The president of cop-outs went on to say, "“It was a clean use of force...The last thing we want the public to think is an inmate was murdered by a correctional officer. That’s clearly not the case.’’

Clearly. It wasn't a correctional officer who beat the paranoid schizophrenic boy to death. It was probably a couple of correctional officers.

Kenneway had the gall to say the medical examiner’s designation of the death as a homicide was simply a "legal term" to indicate that someone was involved in Messier’s death.

Wondering who that someone was? The boy's mother said she hopes someone is charged in her son’s death - especially since other patients of the facility witnessed correction officers taking her son into a back room and beating him to death.

Unfortunately, it's likely the State and it's flunkies at Bridgewater State will corrupt justice at every angle to shelter itself from responsibility. After all, these travesties usually prove that the Just-Us system is just as corrupted as the overzealous foot soldiers it employs on the State level.

Good Luck and God Speed to the family of the deceased, and may the 23 year old Joshua Messier rest in peace.

Mass May Test New Tolling Within Months

2010-03-04T09:55:00.008-05:00

According to Boston.com, Governor Devil Patrick may begin testing a new form of electronic tolling within months. This comes as breaking news to Massholes who never heard of EZ Pass lanes that pretty much every other state has been using for years.

Funny there is no mention in this article linking RFID technology to cancer as many studies have shown. Instead it reads more like an infomercial.

This brings up the issue of having tolls on the road to pay for maintenance and infrastructure. I thought taxes and gigantic stimulus plans that print trillions of imaginary dollars did that?

I can't help but to keep wondering where local taxes go. Every service the state provides is done under direct cost to residents and they always present scapegoats like, "We're charging you to offset costs associated with...blah blah..."

Here in the Wuss, it can referred to as "yellow trash bag syndrome". They charge close to $8 for a couple of bags you have to use to get your trash thrown out. And if the bag is heavy they won't take it and they fine you $50! They say the fines and bag costs pay for sanitation, but didn't taxes serve this purpose?

The other morning, the news reported that the post office is moving to end the handling of mail on Saturday's and STILL raising costs of mailing items. Why? To "offset costs" of the postal system. I thought taxes did that.

The population of tax payers (working or not) GROWS every day. Whether you work a job or not, the IRS has their hand in your pocket at all times, well where does that money go?

Recently, I called the shitty of wusta to inquire on how to properly dispose of a bunch of old furniture I needed to rid of. They told me I can purchase stickers (upwards to $20 each) which I had to adhere to each item in order to have the trash picked-up by the union lazys. I thanked them for their time, gathered up my trash, loaded it in my car and drove around town dumping it illegally.

Now, my broken shit in your trash bin symbolizes the irony of a broken system of ever-increasing financial inconvenience.

Worcester, MA - A Place On the Move!

2010-02-27T10:32:00.003-05:00

Next time someone tells you nothing good ever happens in Worstever, you just send them this here link and let 'em know how we do here in the Woo:

The Village of Peedmont

2010-02-04T01:06:00.006-05:00

Sorry, I just had to create this after coming across the original "logo" and nearly shitting my pants.

(click on graphic to enlarge)

Get Up, A Get Get Get Down - 911 is a Joke in Wortown

2010-02-02T12:56:00.006-05:00

The shitty of Worstever pays onwards of two to even THREE policemen to direct traffic on the same corner. They're usually a comical scene too - like this bag a'donuts on his cell phone while cars take their best guess at navigating through the intersection.

While most streets in this crumb town rot away and destroy people's cars, you'll notice the area behind the gigantic and desolate mall that never was get's ripped up and re-paved every couple of years - employing crooked contracts for cronies of Shitty Hall and police officers by the dozens. Is this ironic or just business as usual for the third rate town?

Freedom is Doing What Your Told!

2010-02-01T12:30:00.001-05:00

Why Worcester is Really Number 1

2009-11-12T16:07:00.010-05:00

I'm betting 4rilly must be on twitter blasting this out to everyone - but in case you haven't been getting your twat on lately - be sure not to miss this:

http://www.disneydreaming.com/2009/11/10/tiffany-thornton-to-sign-autographs-in-worcester-ma/

I believe I recently read somewhere that the DCU is opening their doors up FOR FREE to unemployed locals for all no-name hockey games. (How the fuck else would they get anyone in there for that shit?)

This is what living in the Worst is all about folks! Cash your unemployment check at Pennywise, throw on your best flannel insulated shirt, warm up the ol' pomade and head on over to the DCU for some good old fashioned un-pro hockey mixed with all the statutory you can get your hands on!

SEE YOU THERE!

Ask You Doctor if Dystonia is Right for You

2009-10-28T15:03:00.000-04:00

and I quote:

2009-08-23T21:25:00.001-04:00

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Your Bill of Rights":

Yo BA:

Page C8 of Thursday, August 20 Telegram and Gazette:

The City of Worcester will initiate herbicide application activities throughout select right -of-way areas on appx. August 24,2009 through November 30, 2009 for teh purposes of controlling Poison Ivy and other nuisance and hazard vegetation species. The herbicide Round Up Pro will be applied via hand application and/or truck mounted sprayer and in compliance with 333 CMR 11.00. For additional information please contact Mr. Matthew Labovites, Assistant Commission of Operations, Department of Public Works and Parks, 20 East Worcester Street, Worcester, MA (508)799-1476

ROUND UP F'n PRO ?!?!?!?!? VIVA MONSANTO !!!!
...being sprayed all over Worcester!!111

Harry T
Worcester,MA

Your Bill of Rights

2009-08-10T11:16:00.005-04:00

These days, more than ever - seems most people are somewhat aware that their rights are being violated on a daily bases - somewhere, somehow. But try asking someone what the rights listed in the first ten amendments are and they look at you like a head trauma victim. Here's a refresher for those of you in this category.

YOUR BILL OF RIGHTS

Amendment I
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

Amendment II
A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.

Amendment III
No Soldier shall, in time of peace be quartered in any house, without the consent of the Owner, nor in time of war, but in a manner to be prescribed by law.

Amendment IV
The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.

Amendment V
No person shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise infamous crime, unless on a presentment or indictment of a Grand Jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the Militia, when in actual service in time of War or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offense to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.

Amendment VI
In all criminal prosecutions, the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury of the State and district wherein the crime shall have been committed, which district shall have been previously ascertained by law, and to be informed of the nature and cause of the accusation; to be confronted with the witnesses against him; to have compulsory process for obtaining witnesses in his favor, and to have the Assistance of Counsel for his defense.

Amendment VII
In suits at common law, where the value in controversy shall exceed twenty dollars, the right of trial by jury shall be preserved, and no fact tried by a jury, shall be otherwise reexamined in any Court of the United States, than according to the rules of the common law.

Amendment VIII
Excessive bail shall not be required, nor excessive fines imposed, nor cruel and unusual punishments inflicted.

Amendment IX
The enumeration in the Constitution, of certain rights, shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people.

Amendment X
The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.

There are several sources online that will send copies of this important document as well as the Constitution of the United States such as this one:

https://secure.heritage.org/pocketconstitutions/

Think For Yourself

2009-08-04T12:51:00.007-04:00

In many forums I seem to keep coming across some debate over the relevance of HR875 as it pertains to Organic Farming. I'm surprised there is even room for such a debate in this day in age - then again, there are drones that buy into the propaganda such as the defensive page Monsanto went out of their way to put up on their site in their defense. Just as they did when Food Inc. was released.

It's assuring to know that there are so many i nformed activists countering the propaganda left and right. I found some really great stuff urging folks to look beyond the distraction of HR875 to look further down the road at what other things are happening in the restructuring of food regulation.

Still though, the battle continues, as propaganda discounting the importance of Organic Food seems to be popping up left and right.

Most likely, propaganda such as this holds little water to any consumer with a little insight. At least not compared to the powerful melding between corporations and government that goes way beyond lobbying. Things like Monsanto's own Michael Taylor's position as 'food czar' in the FDA.

This is why each one of us has an urgent responsibility to investigate the present state of the food industry and to look at where it is headed. This is a crucial time to spread awareness and protect the health of our future as a whole. Research these issues on your own and do what you can to promote local organic farming and help destroy Monsanto in anyway possible...

HR 2749 the Seizure of the US food supply and production passed the House

2009-08-02T15:38:00.001-04:00

http://farmwars.info/?p=1320

THIS IS A RE-POST OF ORIGINAL BLOG LINKED ABOVE:

Despite some really eloquent speeches to the contrary, our “for sale” House of Representatives passed the Food Fascism Act….euphemistically called a food safety act, by a margin of about 140 over the naysayer’s.

True to form, Rosa DeLauro spoke about things she knows nothing about and couldn’t care less; Rosa just loves her some Monsanto!

And that exclusion for farms??? Gone! And that includes you organic idiots who thought you had kissed enough behinds to have your industry excluded.

The newly revised bill that appeared overnight after the original was defeated 29^th of July, now includes all those farms we were told would not be affected by this legislation. Of course those big agri-corporations made out like bandits. Biopiracy is going to have a profitable future thanks to the political whore’s in congress we call our representatives.

The entire HR 2749 bill was completely wiped and replaced with an amendment that was the text of another bill similar to, but far more lethal than the first. Now, please tell me again that backroom deals and pre-planned votes don’t happen in congress. To make it look bi-partisan, some Democrats voted no, and some Republicans voted yes. This was to make you think they had actually debated and considered what they all intended to do anyway.

The bill that passed does only two things……..it seizes control of food production and supply and then hands it over to big agri-corporations. The remaining content of the bill is a primer on enforcement……meaning all the powers they have granted themselves to prevent you from claiming Constitutional protections, and enabling them to violate your rights on multiple levels…..all for food safety of course.

There is NOTHING in this bill that will address, prevent or otherwise affect the safety of food. This was federal encroachment which will be extended to the states with the cooperation of state officials. This bill did nothing but establish a police agency, granting it massive and uncontrolled enforcement capabilities allowing it to make up even more rules to benefit its corporate sponsors, as it moves along.

Oh! And did I mention this will be done by expanding the FDA? The FDA for god’s sake!

A November 2007 report titled “Subcommittee on Science and Technology, FDA Science and Mission at Risk” doc was a scathing review of the not only the inadequacies of FDA, but the fact that it in no way can assure the safety of food in the United States.

That report cited the massive failure of FDA to perform even its basic functions, going on to declare the agency’s problems were the result of corporate influence and funding. It should have been declared defunct right then and there, but of course the lobbyists who stalk the hallways of congress on behalf bio-pirates and other parasitic corporations just wouldn’t hear of such a thing.

I can only assume the report on the massive failure of FDA to operate on even a cursory level ended up in the restrooms to wipe the behinds of all those royal asses who hold down seats in the House and who voted today to end competition for industrialized corporate producers while wiping out family and independent operations.

And it wasn’t just the House that sold us out. In the last few months various organic associations and other assorted producers came out with what they described as “myths on the net” about the intention of these bills. Why…..these bills were not going to apply to family and independent farms and ranches and surely not to organic growers. That was just internet hysteria! I wonder who was hysterical last evening as this bill passed specifically bringing them under the expanded FDA authority?

A November 2007 report titled “Subcommittee on Science and Technology, FDA Science and Mission at Risk” doc was a scathing review of the not only the inadequacies of FDA, but the fact that it in no way can assure the safety of food in the United States.

And drinks all around!

I have no doubt that dinner and drinks were being supplied last evening by corporate lobbyists as a way to thank House members for passing this seizure of the US food production and supply. FDA was probably pouring the champagne.

I wonder if anyone thought to invite those organic groups?

Maybe they could give everyone a big dose of Vioxx when they arrive, spike it with a Gardasil shot and then wash it all down with a big giant super sized diet soda loaded with that yummy aspartame. This should all be followed by a meal consisting of gmo infected fruits and veggies with a big slab of genetically altered meat just oozing antibiotics, growth hormones and the residues from chemicals of all kinds, shipped in from a country who gave their word they “inspected” the food before shipping it.

After all, thanks to Henry Waxman and his cohorts in Constitutional Crime, that’s what is going to end up on our plates.

July 31, 2009

Please tell everyone who wants organic foods.....

2009-07-31T13:14:00.006-04:00

US House and Senate are about (in a week and a half) to vote on bill that will OUTLAW ORGANIC FARMING (bill HR 875). There is an enormous rush to get this into law within the next 2 weeks before people realize what is happening.

Main backer and lobbyist is Monsanto – chemical and genetic engineering giant corporation (and Cargill, ADM, and about 35 other related agri-giants). This bill will require organic farms to use specific fertilizers and poisonous insect sprays dictated by the newly formed agency to "make sure there is no danger to the public food supply". This will include backyard gardens that grow food only for a family and not for sales.

If this passes then NO more heirloom clean seeds but only Monsanto genetically altered seeds that are now showing up with unexpected diseases in humans.

There is a video on the subject.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=epXNJNjYBvw&feature=related

And another one:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eeWVkTU1s1E

The name on this outrageous food plan is: Food Safety Modernization Act of 2009 (bill HR 875).

THIS IS REAL, FOLKS! PASS THIS ALONG TO ALL CONCERNED ON YOUR MAILING LISTS & CALL YOUR SENATE REPRESENTATIVES TODAY!

Get on that phone and burn up the wires. Get anyone else you can to do the same thing. The House and Senate WILL pass this if they are not massively threatened with loss of their position.... They only fear your voice and your vote. The best thing to do is go to www.house.gov/writerep . All you have to do is put in your zip and it will give you your congressperson and how to get in touch with them. When you call their office someone will answer the phone, just tell them (politely) that you are calling to express your views on HR 875 and they'll take your name and address and pass your comments along to the congressperson.

The following link is a list of the U.S. senators and their contact info:
http://www.senate.gov/general/contact_information/senators_cfm.cfm

While we're on the subject - do yourself and your family a favor and learn more about Monsanto here:
http://www.hulu.com/watch/67878/the-future-of-food

And print this helpful list to reference when shopping:
http://www.seedsofdeception.com/DocumentFiles/144.pdf
Link text

40z n' Bluntz

2009-07-29T08:00:00.000-04:00

The only herring redder than Wacko Jacko's long overdo demise is certainly the publicity stunt O'baama created out of the "controversial" race incident that was singled out of the millions happening that day between a racist homeowner and a racist cop.

I do have to admit though, all this bullshit in the news about Obama having a friendly beer at the Whitehouse with the cop he called stupid and the Harvard Professor that played the race card to make a buck inspired me...

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW
Washington, DC 20500

Dear Mr. President Obama,

Wassup son? Chillin, chillin. My name is B.A. I'm from the Wu son, you know how we do. What's good man? So yo, check this shit:

Shit was crazy about your boy Gates in the Came-bridge B. That pig Crowley was buggin for real. Yo, it must be mad hard for you to stay cool and not off and have that cat merked. Being the Prez ands shit it ain't like you couldn't do it - but I think it's dope you decided to try to squash that shit and teach mu'fux a lesson about this race shit son. Word life. For real for real.

But yo, peep this:

I was down on Ave man wit my Earth right. Crossing over Main St onto Front St downtown, and yo like outta nowhere, I hear the siren and the beast be on my shit pulling me over. Check it man, I wasn't speeding cause there was mad traffic, it was rush hour. Top of that, the light I went through was green, so yo I'm start started thinking like, "The Jake's buggin son. Always out to burn a mu'fuk," right?

So yo, I pull over right, blocking traffic and the bus stop and all that - so I pull over right - and yo I'm like, "May I help you officer?"

Cop says, "Turn the car off a minute. Wait right here for me" and walks over to consult to a second cop car that pulled up. So there's a whole scene developing here now. Niggz walking by like, "Oh Shit!" My girl starts coppin attitude too, talking 'bout we about to be late picking up the kids.

So after like 30 seconds, the cop comes back over with an Arab from the corner store. He like, "This man here owns the corner store over there. He says you've been driving by casing his store all day. There's been some robberies..."

The Arab jumps in at that point, bending closer into my window and squinting at me - "No, no. Sorry, no. This not the one. Sorry. Look a lot like him. Same car."

I'm like, "The Fuck?" and you know my girl start wildin' out, so the cop rolls his eyes at the Arab, asks him if he sure, the Arab now shaking his head like Michael J Fox - and the pig turns back to me and nods and says, "You can go." And that was that.

YOU can go? YOU? What's he mean by that shit? You? And what, no apology? What's up with that shit? I got pulled over for looking like some shit. Tell me that shit ain't profiln' son!?!

Yo, I think THAT neg rascially profiled me son. And yo, if that brother from Harvard getting a beer for his shit, yo I want what's due mine coming to me son. I think you should at least make that cop buy me a brew for that shit son.

What's good baby?

World Health Organization Accused of Mass Murder

2009-07-27T11:26:00.001-04:00

END MONSANTO!

2009-07-22T10:31:00.015-04:00

Please read this blog post and follow the informative links to learn more about the battle in the food industry that many people are unfortunately sleeping right through. This is a critical time for people to wake up and do something before it's too late.

I especially think you should print this PDF to better arm yourself when shopping in your local supermarket.

Be sure to check out this movie to better understand the importance of fighting against GMOs:

Also, do the world a favor and accept the challenge:

You can also seek safer alternatives to Round-Up from sources like this:
http://www.myqute.com/2009/06/replace-roundup-challenge-gmo-blockade/

and this:
http://www.responsibletechnology.org/GMFree/Home/index.cfm

The time has come to take action against Monsanto in the form of educating one another, boycotting their products, class-action suits, petitioning local government against their presence, etc... This company is everything Orwell, Vonnegut, and Huxley warned us about.

P.S. KEEP LOCAL GOVERNMENT AWARE OF THE DANGERS SURROUNDING H.R.875

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour - Manufacturing Fear to Push Drugs Cont.

2009-07-22T10:11:00.004-04:00

As the fall approaches, beware of any vaccinations for this Swine Flu facade. Don't allow the pharmaceutical companies to poison your children through government strong arming...

Read This:
http://www.ageofautism.com/2009/07/first-swine-flu-shots-will-not-be-safety-tested.html

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour - Pop Goes The Propaganda

2009-07-16T17:18:00.002-04:00

This post is nothing more than a link to a link - buy hey, it's some pretty good shit man...

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour - Revelations Made Easy

2009-07-15T11:19:00.014-04:00

What's in Your Wallet?

Most likely, it's The Mark of the Beast...

An interesting blog devoted to exposing the risks of RFID usage has recently emerged. Be sure to check it out.

If you are unfamiliar with RFID technology, you can read more about it here and here and learn how they are used to track everything from your whereabouts, to the contents of your stomach .

As we move closer to the Real ID takeover - it makes sense that Congress ordered that switch to digital television from analog to free up public airwaves for better RFID usage. Most people were tricked into believing it was to enhance crystal-clear programing - as if that would be a concern to the U.S. Government.

Vernon Hill Park - Site Improvements Need to Dig Deeper

2009-07-07T15:35:00.000-04:00

Summer seems to have finally come to Worcester. This past weekend brought the much anticipated sun and high temperatures most people in this city have been aching for all June. This time of year seems to have the longest-lasting days, with the yellow sun burning brightly in the sky well past 8pm. It's the perfect season for taking lazy strolls in the park after dinner. That's unless you happen to find yourself in the Vernon Hill section of town.

Vernon Hill Park has recently undergone a drastic makeover. Though the park always looked pretty nice from the street, a walk to the playground area showed a different view all together. The type of view any concerned parent would normally shield from the eyes of their toddler. Slides vandalized with curses that would make even a cab driver blush. Crude drawings of genitalia done in sharpie covering the entire jungle gym. Broken 40oz bottles and cigarette butts mixed in with the mulch like some sort of toxic salad.

In an act of good faith, many dollars* have been funneled into giving this very populated park a face lift. About a week or so ago, I drove passed there and noticed the old pool has been transformed into a whimsical wonderland of aquatic fun. There was a giant mushroom with an everlasting stream of water pouring down in gigantic sheets on the happy children below. This was part of a "splash park" in the zero-depth entry of the pool on the one end, with a large blue slide on the deep end of the pool for the bigger kids.

Another big improvement to the park was the complete leveling of the vandalized playground that once plagued the appearance of the otherwise well-kept landscape. A completely brand new jungle gym with two nice slides and other interesting climbing surfaces were installed in addition to a brand new set of swings. The broken glass and cigarette butts were raked out and fresh mulch was laid down as well.

What an improvement to the city this refurbished park seems to be...
when passing by it at 30mph that is.

Yesterday afternoon after dinner I decided to take a walk and get a closer look at the updated park and what a revelation that proved to be. It seemed to me, that you can put a fresh coat of paint on the ghetto, but underneath it all - it's the same old shit.

As I approached the playground from the distance I could see that it was pretty crowded. As I got closer I started to notice the age of the kids hanging out there seemed to be a bit old to playing on a jungle gym.

Without exaggerating, I can tell you there must have been at least 20 kids stuffed up atop the structure of slides and monkey bars - not one of them under fifteen years old by the looks of things. Profanity would be putting lightly the type of language these kids were spewing out of their mouths. One boy was yelling across to the park at a fleeing group of girls something about stabbing them if they come back again. This thuggish group of teenagers just gathered there atop the slide like a cantankerous mold. Fighting loudly amongst themselves, cussing, spitting, smoking pot. I had to stop and stare in awe for a moment and contemplate where the parents of these kids were. That thought finished with a thunderous cough followed by the unmistakable sound of someone hocking a loogie. I turned to see the answer to my question standing right in front of me. These kid's parents were right there along with them. A middle-aged woman looking tuberculosis stricken pushed her baby in a swing with the one hand while the other one held a cigarette. Another parent, still a youth himself, sat at a bench next to a noisy stroller - a Coors in one hand and a cell phone to his ear.

The array of sights, sounds and smells had me questioning what a innocent child, seven or eight years old– the type of child the designers of this play area had in mind – would think if they came to the park to play and wandered innocently into this scene. The five minutes I was there was long enough for me to know right there and then, that no innocent child would ever probably even get to use this playground. I realized that the sickness of this neighborhood went a lot deeper than anything a face lift could cover-up. I felt heaviness in my heart knowing that in a matter of weeks, by the end of the summer – this park would be vandalized, beaten, and bypassed by anyone seeking a healthy environment for their children to play in.

Taking it all in, I felt the heavy weight of disappointment and an overall lack of hope for the quality of life in this town. As I made my way through the park, I noticed how the beautiful new pool they had just built held the reflection of the sun setting and I imagined the types of things that would happen there this summer now that these spray parks don't require supervision. A breeze carried the chill of impending night and I realized I ought to head back before the sun went down.

The Rules of Engagement

2009-07-06T22:35:00.000-04:00

This is a bit long but well worth the time. It really demonstrates what happens when a group of organized individuals try and "opt out of the system" as one commentator said.

This brutal massacre took place instead of the warranted search that the ATF pretended to be there for. So much for the "religious freedom" they pretend the settlers at Plymouth Rock came here for.

Perhaps the most important lesson taught here in this film, is the role the media plays in manufacturing consent by spinning the news. If anyone has any information regarding the FLDS conspiracy that took place last year, where the military wreaked havoc and kidnapped all those children, please let me know. According to many independent news sources, the same kind of "Cult" propaganda was used in that incident as well.

PART 1

PART 2

2009-07-06T22:31:00.001-04:00

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

2009-07-05T12:57:00.001-04:00

2009-07-04T20:25:00.001-04:00

They All Want The Big Asshole

2009-07-04T12:22:00.001-04:00

This past week has been a hell of a ride for the Big Asshole. It seems that quite a few of my biggest fans have really become impassioned to the point of hysterical madness to find out my actual name. While I never set out to actually be an anonymous blogger, I quickly began to see the benefits of remaining anonymous to preserve the ignorance of my enemies. Especially when other bloggers have proven to be more obsessive than anorexics at the beach.

One guy really dug deep and posted up entire family albums of someone he suspected to be me. He literally spent OVER 24 hours of straight posting photos, building websites of photos, writing and updating continuous threads, and commenting on his work all the while. TWO DAYS STRAIGHT.

On the other hand, there's the Wormtown Taxi guy who decided to begin what he thinks will be an ongoing blog fight between he and I by trying to antagonize me with some inane post he made about me being a big bully and a coward and a hypocrite and all the rest of it. He even broke his own code of blog ethics and cussed me out and everything. But then he ended the post with some ridiculous sentence about how everyone loves a good flamer or something...

All this recent attention has been great on the one hand - I always enjoy the publicity and new followers and commenteurs that this sort of action brings (even if it is usually anonymous). But, on the other hand it raises a question that's been nagging me now for a couple days - Why do people feel so passionately about a silly blog written by a self-proclaimed Big Asshole?

Now granted, there have been quite a number of times that I played devil's advocate on a thread here and there. There have also been times I post facetious blogs to stir up some shit. But one would really have to be dense not to find the underlying humor in any of my posts on the local yokel's goings on. So why is it then, that two of my most mature readers have completely snapped, off the deep end over this online persona?

Perhaps it was one too many disagreeable comments on their blogs that sent them into hysteria. I often disagree with Paulie's Point of View (almost always when it pertains to local politics and his take on the poorer folks in the city). But, we've always seemed to be able to disagree, argue our points, throw some character punches in here and there and call it a day. I've even told him that I hate his ideas, but I respect the fact that he can argue a point with some relevance at least. Hell, I even admit that I've read him post a few things that I full-out agreed with.

Jeff at Wormtown Taxi really perplexes me though. I mean, I've been reading his blog for a lot longer than I even had my own. In between writing completely pointless blogs about bumps in the street and other really impotent material, he has put down some words that closely amount to journalism. At times I've even shared them on my blog. Perhaps that's actually where his beef may have come from. When I first started my blog, he was one of my first real readers and his salutation to me was an accusation of plagiarism for posting a blog of his even though it was fully linked and credited to his Wormtown site. He wrote a few posts throwing digs at me, but as soon as I would respond he'd change his tune and apologize. Even still though, I remained a writer and commentator of his work at the Taxi site. As opposed to Paulie's site, I quite often agreed with Jeff's points (though not always) and left many comments on his blogs (none of them at all antagonistic to him or his personal character). According to him, he started moderating his comments just to keep me off his site because I wrote "Fuck the IRS" in a comment on his post about taxes being unconstitutional. (This coming from a man who just told me to "Grow the Fuck Up" in his most recent blog.)

Apparently, folks in the Worstever blogosphere (all 6 of them) seem to think that I am a bully and a hypocrite and some kind of coward and whatever else - all because I write a blog about local shit I find amusing while trying to maintain a certain level of privacy. After seeing Paulie's debacle unfold the other day, can anyone really blame me for not wanting to disclose my friggin private information with these people?

I mean, sure I write humorous criticism and silly posts about local people who think they're important in between other posts about matters of actual relevance, yeah - but come on now! Why come here to read what I write if you can't have a sense of humor about it?

These guys call me a hypocrite and whatever else, but nowhere have I ever written about making any kind of a difference here in this shit town. I could give a shit - I just like laughing at those that are pretending to be something they're not.

As for me, I'm not pretending to be anything at all. Think of me as a transient, passive observer pointing fingers and making some fun of my stay in your little town while it lasts. That's all this is folks. You can choose to tune in and have a laugh, start an argument, poke some fun - or you can just go about your business and forget that I'm here. Whatever you choose, do yourself a solid and don't become obsessed. After all, I won't be here that long...

thanks

2009-07-03T21:16:00.003-04:00

Celebrate The Hate

2009-07-02T19:29:00.012-04:00

Worsttown Taxi - The George Foreman of Internet Arguments, has decided to express his distaste for yours truly on his blog. Read the entire piece of shit here.

Obviously, he won't allow my response to be published on his own blog because he likes to keep a nice clean page over there, so I decided (as usual) to post my response here since I know he'll be watching for it.

Ol'Man River addresses this whole "unmasking" issue that seems to be preoccupying the minds of the local blogosphere these days. I know I ask this all the time, but really folks, if you knew my name, would it matter at all? I don't know you any more than you know me. And Jeff, personally I don't really WANT to know you - I'm 1/8th your age. I am honored to have made your blog review though - I know just how important you think it is.

Y’all are quick to call me a bully, yet you post blogs like this. Obviously this is done to antagonize me – I mean what do you expect?

So my negative review posts regarding the Havehertrashery and Shitspace really tied your panties in a knot ey? Any criticism of these businesses is equivalent to misogyny to you? Have you looked that word up lately? Where in either of those posts is gender an issue at all? Perhaps the Alzheimers is setting in after all. Hope the cab license renewal isn't coming up anytime soon.

I'm not sure how writing a humorous blog online to share with my peers is equivalent to cowardice - I mean quite honestly the day I ever call a cab and you show up is the day I tell you to your face you're a old charlatan who's days of wit have long passed.

So you say, "people who are essentially unhappy with who they are in real life will, inevitably, be drawn to this type of secretive online behavior. I've seen it online for years."
- so you're a psychologist, cab driver, photographer AND journalist now too eh? Jack of all trades, master of none I can see. Maybe in the next life (seeing it's so closely around the corner), you'll get a better chance. Face it, the only thing you’ve been seeing online for years is solitaire and old lady porn.

You also said regarding Paulie's recent nervous meltdown that, "Pushing Paulie to this point of exasperation has been nothing short of online terrorism"
-Of all the moronic and backwards things you have written in the past - this takes the cake! Online terrorism is a drunk guy sitting behind a keyboard posting photos of a man and his entire family for 16 hours straight! Online terrorism is creating pages on your business website where you post photos of a man you don't know and his children! The only thing that "pushes" someone to that point is psychosis and I hope the guy does get sued for that kind of craziness.

All I've ever done is poke some fun, make some jokes and provide some opinionated commentary.

One more thing; when you say you "don't wish me any good will, any forgiveness, or any slightest way out."
-I got news for ya man, I don't need your wish of good will, forgiveness, or way out Jeff. You got a good ten years or so left in the old ticker, I think I'll out live ya just the same.

Thank you for calling. Please play again soon.

What's Wrong With Us

2009-07-02T14:13:00.003-04:00

I get letters from readers all the time. Most of them are too profane to publish or contain just too much nudity for public view. Recently though, I got one that made a good point about e-merican culture and the modern day Rome we really are. This is from a friend in the midwest:

I saw this girl at work with a $1 paper pointing out some guy she knew. At a closer look I noticed that the entire newspaper was mug shots of recent arrests with a little caption (Extreme DUI, Sex-Offender, Unpaid Fines, etc) under each photo. I couldn't believe its legal to profit off this kind of thing! Worse still - I can't believe people actually buy it!

Here's an actual PDF version of an issue:

These publishers should be real proud. Awfully nice of them to offer larger pictures for the sex offenders and notice how the paper really splurges to make sure sex offenders get color pictures. Perhaps that's thanks to Sears who advertises on the very same page.

They even have a kiddie corner for juveniles! And oh look - The Tears and Smiles and Deadbeat Parents sections are amongst the most compassionate! I guess no one is safe, despite the old saying "Innocent until Proven Guilty." After all, the listings in this paper show arrests, not convictions.

For some reason, when CorMedia initially requested access to all this info, NC said they could not differentiate between arrests and convictions for some reason, maybe it would be too much work. Here is how the Slammer Team responded to my inquiries regarding the legality of profiting directly through the sale of public records and by selling advertising linked to such records...

Hello,

Thanks for your email and interest in The Slammer!

It sounds like you're interested in the legal side of newspaper publishing. It is very interesting to say the least.

The first amendment of the US Constitution provides the framework for the ability of The Slammer to publish each week.

Arrest records, including arrest photographs, are considered public records in all 50 states.

There is nothing illegal about selling a newspaper, or (attempting to) profit from the sale of that newspaper.

There is nothing illegal about selling advertisements to be included in a newspaper.

Neither Arizona law nor Federal law would "allow" newspaper publishing, they would only make laws that could attempt to "outlaw" newspaper publishing. Such a law would be unconstitutional, and therefore illegal.

Thanks for taking the time to write and best wishes!

The Slammer Team

Isaac W. Cornetti
Publisher

CorMedia LLC
PO Box 12531
Raleigh, NC 27605-2531
Email : publisher@slammernews.com
Fax : 866.730.2221
Phone : 866.736.5530
Mobile : 919.434.4475

I followed up and asked them if it does not violate 5th and 14th amendments by publicly criminalizing citizens before any due process takes place - since these people have been arrested not convicted.

They haven't responded. That was weeks ago now.

Thanks for sharing this letter. It really goes to show that there really is a niche market out there for sadistic fucks who slurp up shit like The Slammer, Faces of Death, C.O.P.S and things along those lines. Really makes you wonder how far away we are from returning back to gladiator events. It amazes me that folks will go out of their way and even pay to see other people suffering. All one really has to do to play voyeur to a world of people downtrodden by society is take the city bus to work one day.

Much Needed Levity

2009-07-02T13:32:00.003-04:00

I'm sorry but this is just too funny not to share.

Collyer Bluff

2009-07-01T23:11:00.022-04:00

What a week it's been folks! The only thing worse than the pain in the ass of moving is finally getting your office set back up and being inundated with emails.

The only thing worse than that of course is knowing there's a psychotic stalker looking for you everywhere!

Seems local drunken slumlord Paul Collyer has had nothing better to do than spend an entire Wednesday playing detective (take a look at his blog if you don't believe me). Apparently this man has no pesky job or family responsibilities to break up his time. Lucky guy.

Anyways, by the looks of the worcesterite site, it seems he absentmindedly followed a lead from local junk collecter Phunky and decided to go on a two day long journey of inebriated investigation work only to conclude by advertising photos and musical projects of many of my comrades in arms, loyal readers/wusstah expatriates.

At first glance, I thought it was funny seeing ol'Paulie so worked up that he obsessively devoted 12 hours into what he thought was genius investigation work when he merely had to ask me straight out what my real name is. But after 12 hours seemed to have slip into 16 and then what now looks like a full 24 hour period - I'm starting to feel really bad for the guy. I had no idea my commentary on his inane opinions really burnt him to the point of breaking laws.

My Tales from The Shitty Site is written for pure amusement for me and a few friends who get a kick out of poking fun at the little city that could have been (but never was) and the characters that make it that way. The humor can be lowbrow, but hell so is this town.

Anyways, over the past 100 or so entries I have written, I have poked fun at everything from big government to local absurdities like the city council and local big wig wannabes like Paulie. Most people either laugh along with me or dismiss me as just another negative voice in the sea of negative worcester residents.

Not Paulie O'Coyle though. Criticize his views on urban development or debate his take on city sanitation and he's on his way to a nervous breakdown! Seriously, for the past 26+ hours the poor guy's been teamed up with his buddy and local Where's Waldo look-a-like Bill Rantdull scouring the internet for any and all information they can get on yours truly.

After two days, zero sleep, and God only knows how many budweisers later - the best the "wee lass" can come up with is a bunch of photos of a guy playing with his kids. Over 20 hours of dirt digging to find pics of a birthday party! I guess it doesn't take the brightest bulb in the box to own a three-deckah in dah Main South slum after all.

As scary and disturbing as it is to know a middle-aged man with no real job or family of his own is hunting the internet, digging through thousands of myspace comments, and scouring other family's virtual photoalbums - I think we can all agree that a deep sadness is to be had for a man of this caliper. Especially considering the guy actually saved stacks of photos of a young family and built an entire web page on his BUSINESS SITE in a creepy shrine.

I'm not exactly sure why any sober individual would actually assume a man living in New York would really give a rat's ass about wussy to keep constantly updating a blog about local happenings, but thanks to one ditsy broad with saggy knee-caps and a couple of dipshit slumlords - I know someone whose google search results must be going through the roof. I gotta say I'm a "wee bit jealous."

One thing I can say for sure though, is THANKS PAULIE and Willie RantDull for the added attention to my blog and for advertising so many cool links! My hits are going through the roof this week now and you know just how much that means to an attention grabbing comment whore like me!

I'm as flattered as I am saddened I must admit. TWENTY SOMETHING HOURS laboriously spent over "uncovering" my identity (which by the way was never made to be anonymous in the beginning.) Knowing my real name is as pointless as it is trying to get Paulie to quit drinking. In case he hasn't realized by the lack of comments on his blog (besides the 20 something he wrote and the couple from his girlfriend) - much like his "event promotions business", nobody gives a shit. Perhaps he should have just devoted the past two days to quitting drinking, losing some weight, or doing something else that would work toward getting his own family instead of idolizing over other people's.

Hey Coyle, I got about 5 readers big guy, and you and your girl make up two of them. If you're spending TWO entire "workdays" tediously examining random people's myspace pages trying to find out what I look like, chances are the REAL BIG ASSHOLE is YOU :>)

I don't know what to tell you Collyer. I'd quit while you're ahead before you pull enough rope to hang yourself in a lawsuit of sorts. Maybe just pick-up another hobby...

Leprechaun In The Hood

2009-06-26T16:51:00.006-04:00

I just so happen to stumble across this recent post over at the Paulie's Point of View blog. As usual, reading it reminded me of just how naive and close-minded the hillbillies in this town can get.

See if you can stomach through his rant and the comments there before you read my take on it here.

Chances are, the real reason "la famiglia" (I always love those racist pretenses he uses) really came to Worstever because gentrification kicked them out of their buildings in NY. Do a little research into what has been happening to Brooklyn for the past ten years. The government unconstitutionally tears away property under eminent domain (always abusing that power) and then turns around and hands it (corporate welfare style) to places like Target and Whole Foods, etc. The people that rent (or yes even "mooch" as Paulie see's it) in the buildings that get leveled in that process are then driven out. Where do they turn? Well back to the government (and your tax dollars) AGAIN - but this time they get pushed further from their original dwelling to places like Worstever, where low-income housing seems to grow rampant thanks to the greasy palms of the shitty council.

Certainly nobody ever "heard there was a better way of life" here in Wuss as Paulie says. These folks ended up where they’re at as a direct cause of gentrification happening somewhere else. It’s the classic push-down/pop-up scenario that happens all the time when folks with a little money and zero education in basic sociology get involved with city-planning.

It is somewhat relieving to know that even in the worst living conditions and processing by the system - people still have the spirit to find small slices of happiness somehow. Whether it's through celebrating birthdays, or nosily spying on your neighbor's lifestyle and looking through their mail and photographing their trash like Paulie and Frilly. I’d rather the thought of a “wee kid” hanging on a tree branch than a full grown man diving in a dumpster, tearing open bags to read people’s mail.

Speaking of trash, this scam the shitty got going where one has to buy THEIR brand, yellow, flimsy, WAY over-priced garbage bags in order to get removal service has proven to be a leading culprit in illegal dumping city-wide since they started that extortion racket. I've lived in many cities in my life and this is by far the WORST when it comes to the sanitation pick-up policies and procedures. Seems like common sense to me; when people can't afford to throw away trash, what do you expect them to do with it? You bet they’ll find a way to get it out of their house by whatever means necessary.

It's Hip to Be Square

2009-06-26T13:28:00.002-04:00

Worsttown Taxi's Jeffrey Barnyard put a post up regarding the city's takeover of the old Midtown Mall.

I was compelled to leave a comment there but seeing as how I'm not his nephew or drinking buddy, or fellow Zonkherass groupie, I won't be given the incredible honor to have my comments published there. So, as I do from time to time, I comment here nonetheless in the hopes that I annoy his wrinkled ass.

(I have nothing against the geezer personally, and I feel there is no other gathering place that compares for inane and redundant news than his blog.)

- BUT I DIGRESS -

The Midtown Mall is one of the only places left downtown that has a store selling ninja swords out the front and Lady H out the back. It's as much as a staple in downtown culture as the torn out, faded Strawberries sign that lurks behind the "Main Beauty Supply" storefront that offers some of the cheapest bags o'hair the city has to offer.

It's sad to see Mikey O'Brainless smash it with his iron fist to make room for the Banana Republic or Barnes and Mo'bull that City Square will inevitably place there (for three months until they close). Besides, it's a shame that one of the only Mom and Pop Pharmacies still existing in this shit town will be lost in this action. Business will never be the same.

Satan's Getting His Fuck On Tonight!

2009-06-25T21:55:00.000-04:00

The King of Popping young men's cherries died today at age 50. He will be remembered by his hit songs, incredible dance abilities, and paying huge sums of money to the families of boy's he raped to keep quiet. He is also most famous as the man who turned this:

into this:

R.I.P. M.J.

In other news, Paul McCartney is reported to be happier than ever...

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour - IDIOT POLITICIANS MEET IDIOT-RUN NEWSPAPER

2009-06-25T11:30:00.001-04:00

his eloquence..........has always.........makes.........proud

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

2009-06-23T22:47:00.003-04:00

I've been providing this service for years for free! Who knew - I could have made a fortune...

http://www.kushsupport.com/

Juxtaposed 2: Difference Between Emerican'ts and the Rest of the World

2009-06-22T12:01:00.005-04:00

When Iranian's Suspects Election Fraud:

When Emerican'ts Suspect Election Fraud:

Juxtaposed 1: Difference Between Appreciation of Mother's and Father's

2009-06-22T11:59:00.000-04:00

After making a trip to the supermarket on both Mother's Day morning and then again on Father's Day morning I noticed a big difference worthy of noting.

On Mother's Day, the entrance to the market was flooded with vibrant flowers in all different elaborate arrangements and bouquets for sale.

On Father's Day, the entrance to the market had a few flowers too. But this was different. They were all stuffed into those logs and plantable green cones for ease of planting at the cemetery.

The idea to start a segment on my blog noting ironic comparisons was born...

The Omnivore's Dilemma

2009-06-22T09:55:00.000-04:00

I just finished watching a very insightful lecture given by writer Michael Pollan, author of The Omnivore's Dilemma and In Defense of Food: An Eater's Manifesto as well as many other life-changing books.

Amongst the many invaluable messages Mr. Pollan spoke on in his lecture, there were a couple of statistics that really jumped off the screen at me. I truly hope that you take the time to watch this insightful lecture, but in case you do not - here are those statistics I find most worthy of mention:

17% of fuel use is spent on the food industry. To put it in perspective, we currently use 18% of our fuel use for transportation. Think of the difference we could make in the world if we made a choice to eat locally and morally responsibly.

Many people complain that eating locally grown food is more expensive and that they can not afford to eat organic. There is two things they ought to consider:

1. You are paying more than the difference in cost when you ignorantly purchase unsustainable food from the effects on the environment, to your health, and even in your tax dollars. It's a higher price to pay on so many levels.

2. Food is the source of life - we need to be spending more on it. Really stop and think about that for a moment. It's probably THE most important thing you buy and it's an investment in your health and the well being of your children's planet.

We spend less now then we ever did on our food. We (the PLANET) spend less than 10% of our incomes on food. This is less than any other time in history. Thirty years ago that number was 18%! Think about that. Where is that extra money going? Cell phones? Television? Gadgets? Entertainment? Taxes?

With each item you buy you are making the world what it is. In this precarious age with so many concerns about bio terrorism and the collapse of wthe global economy, do you really want all of the precious food sources centralized? We have essentially done this with oil and look what this has brought us. You have an important say! Educate yourself. Read labels. Don't just buy "Organic," buy local. Locate and visit the farms in your community. Come down to the farmer's market and meet other people who celebrate and value food for what it's truly worth. I guarantee that you will notice a BIG difference in the social value of your supermarket experience vs. your experience at the farmer's market. In Worcester, there is one at 807 Main Street every Saturday from 10am to 2pm from June through September.

Educate yourself. Read, read, read!!! And most importantly - educate the children. Each One Teach One.

For more information check out:
http://www.farmfresh.org/

Truly Representative of a Shit Town

2009-06-19T12:30:00.011-04:00

Once in a great while, I make the mistake of reading a Worcester Magazine. It's like shitting in a public restroom - no one ever wants to do it, but sooner or later it has to happen - it's unavoidable. Ironically, the two elements of this analogy usually go hand in hand. Over the past year of living in the Worst, the only time I've ever held the WoMag open I coincidentally also held a brown log from my asshole.

Yesterday's encounter was a bit different though. In packing for a move, I needed to find an alternative to costly plastic bubble wrap for my breakables. I grabbed the whole stack of Worstever Mags from the nearest Ho Farms. The manager was quite surprised because according to him nobody besides homeless drunks in search of ass paper ever take the shit rag out of the store.

So anyways - there I was, wrapping up some dishes in the WhoaMag and I couldn't help but look at the cover "art." For a moment, I thought I accidentally took home a post ass-wiped copy of the paper - then I realized this was the actual design of cover!

The cover story, "Making Art in Worcester" couldn't have better represented the way art is done here in the Worst. By the absolute shit job that resident fArtist Veronica Hebard did on that cover, the magazine really makes an incredible statement to the world (or rather the 8 contributors that actually read the paper). It seems to say, "Here in Worcester, we like our art done very fast and without too much thought or relevance." And what better way to make that statement then to take a really crappy shot of Wussie's failed Union Station and take a digital shit all over it in Photoshop by carelessly wiping brushes of CMYK over the image to give it that "I'm just learning Digital Design" feel that is so prevalent throughout the Whoamag.

Now don't get me wrong, I think Hebard is a talented artist, but perhaps she should stick to the cutesy little illustrations that seem to have no local theme or relevance. You know, the ones that replaced the highly creative and locally relevant artwork of Action Geek.

One can't help but notice though, that after the Womag changed hands this latest time, the content went from nepotism stuffed shit to just plain shit with zero subsistence what so ever.

Aside from the tiny comic section losing all relevance, focus your attention to the "Slants and Rants" section if you dare. One thing you can depend on in this shithole village we live in is that every asshole has an opinion. Yet from the Wussie Magazine, an out of towner would assume that our town has only one lesbian with an opinion. That's right, I am alluding to the cry and complain your way into a job "journalist" Janice Harvey* who chooses to use the "Slants and Rants" section nine times out of ten for saying good bye in a maudlin obituary thinly disguised as an editorial. The Slants and Rants department of the paper seems to be dedicated to either her or E.I.C. and Harold Ramis look-a-like Jim Keogh as a place to say goodbye to dead loved ones. Who needs strong-minded opinions relevant to the state of the world when we have relatives of paper staff members dying? One week it's saying bye bye to daddy and the next week it's bye bye to your friend's daddy.

And speaking of misusing newspaper pages, how about that Blog Log? Now there's a relevant name at last! What a Log of Shit! Apparently, Scotty follows suit to Doreen Manning's approach of long naps in lieu of writing. You know, that same "let the news write itself" approach that exploits the public's desire to shamelessly self-promote and converts it directly into news copy.

Doreen continuously posts ads (instead of stories) looking for readers to submit band write-ups or random artwork, or anything that will get her out of writing or doing any research herself. She then turns around and posts them as her columns and actually collects a pay check from the paper for this.

Zowie works in similar fashion with his Blog Log compilation. I admit, it's a great marketing idea to get morons like 4rilla and Gabe Roly-Poly to pick the paper up weekly but I mean, does the average minded worsteverite really enjoy reading about some lazy poser's half a block bike ride to catch a glimpse of Clinton's truck passing through the neighborhood? I mean literally, a few weeks ago there was a blog published about Phunky's dilemma on how she should organize all the shoes she's been finding in local trash cans for better sales.

The "People on the Street," segment like the "1,001 words" segment went to hell after Jeff Loughlin bounced. The content in both these sections seriously shit the bed. I mean who gives a flying fuck when the last time 5 random people stopped downtown rode a bicycle?

When Veronica Hebard's mediocre drawings replaced Action Geek's talented illustrated commentary, the comic strip's creator advised Hebard, "Just be sure not to make any waves or express an opinion that's contrary or viewed to be negative." That quote certainly sums up the stance of the WussMag since it's latest buyout. The ad rag does nothing to speak on the intellectual and creative diversity that does exist in the cracks and crevices of this town. What it does do though, it wraps your breakables pretty nicely when you're packing to move out of this (reportedly) mundane village.

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

2009-06-19T00:38:00.011-04:00

Japan warns that North Korea may fire missile at U.S. on independence day!

Get ready for another staged attack a la Northwoods Project/ 911

DISNEY PRESENTS FEMA CAMP 2010 HERE WE GO!!!! YAY!!!

The Drugging of the Children

2009-06-18T16:49:00.006-04:00

With the Swine Flu hype coming round full circle (you didn't think the pharmaceutical companies would give up so quickly did you?) you can bet that your children are being labeled as easy targets for the pharmaceutical companies to force feed more diseases in the unspoken name of population control.

Since they are not going to require your permission to stab your children with poison, you best educate yourself on this subject and do what you can to protect your kids against this inhumane activity of the lowest form.

Here is a video to get you started:

Vaccination - The Hidden Truth

The Healing of The Nation

2009-06-15T23:53:00.022-04:00

Hemp could provide us with Food, Clothes, Shelter, Paper, Medicine, Essential oils, hell even cars. Because of it's classification as a "weed" it requires no pesticides or weed killers to grow so it never harms the earth like many of today's genetically engineered agricultural products do (such as cotton). (Not to mention tt is completely biodegradable.)

In fact, up until DUPONT made hemp growth illegal to promote it's cotton, hemp was a major help to the economy of the U.S. and beyond. It even helped the country get through several wars. The growth and use of hemp is as important to American history as, well, the Declaration of Independence – which was written on hemp paper. Or Levi’s jeans, originally made with hemp fiber. Or from the very beginning, say the Jamestown or Plymouth Rock colonies where it was illegal NOT to grow hemp. Even the first flag was hemp fabric.

For some further reading, here's what The Bible has to say:

Who covereth the heaven with clouds, and prepareth rain for the earth. Who maketh grass to grow on the mountains, and herbs for the service of men.
Psalm 147 verse 8

Then God said, "Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the surface of all the earth, and every tree which has fruit yielding seed; it shall be food for you;
Genesis 1:29

Blessed are those who made these Little Debbie snack cakes for they are the righteous bringers of happiness.
Matty 5:12pm

(Okay, I made that one up - but you get the point)

If you'd like to get involved with the advocacy of hemp you can get on board here:
http://www.votehemp.com/

or check out http://blog.mpp.org/

Falsely Advertised Products: Hansen's All Natural Soda

2009-06-15T20:44:00.013-04:00

Subject: General Product Information
Name: Big Asshole
Address: Asshole Ave
City: Worstever
State: MA
Zip: 016**
Phone: 1-900-hot-hott
E-Mail: reallybigass@gmail.com

Product line interested in: Soda
Specific Product: Vanilla Cola - UPC code 0708478764003

How can we help you?

I have been enjoying Hansen's Root Beer soda with my family for a couple of years now. My family prides itself in consuming 90% organic foods and diligently seeks out All Natural products, as Hansen's claims to be. Aside from your root beer product, my family consumes no other soda at all - EVER. This is because my wife and I refuse to put anything with High Fructose Corn Syrup on our table. When we first came across Hansen's Root Beer, we were thrilled and once we tasted it - we were hooked! We still only treat ourselves a couple times a month, but if we have a party or something, we stalk up large on the product.

You can imagine our disappointment when we accidentally purchased your Vanilla Cola (the can looks so similar). Only AFTER I opened the can and drank from it did I realize it was Cola and not Root Beer. It tasted okay, but after inspecting the label I noticed that in fact does contain High Fructose Corn Syrup! What an outrage this was for us. We felt betrayed by the false advertising on the label that clearly states NATURAL SODA.

High Fructose Corn Syrup is not at all natural. If I wanted chemically mutated ingredients in my drink I would save the extra money I pay for Hansen's and just get Coke or Pepsi or some other poisonous product and save significant money.

I am writing because my image of your company has been greatly tarnished and I am very disappointed in Hansen's for falsely advertising a product as All Natural (and charging "all natural" prices) when in fact it contains High Fructose Corn Syrup.

When my children ingested this substance (before I noticed we were tricked) I felt we were taken advantage of in the worst way.

Now, In May 2006, the Center for Science in the Public Interest (CSPI) threatened to file a lawsuit against Cadbury Schweppes for labeling 7 Up as "All Natural" or "100% Natural”, despite the presence of high-fructose corn syrup. Although the U.S. FDA has no general definition of "natural", CSPI claims that HFCS is not a “natural” ingredient due to the high level of processing and the use of at least one genetically modified (GMO) enzyme required to produce it. On January 12, 2007, Cadbury Schweppes agreed to stop calling 7 Up "All Natural". They now label it "100% Natural Flavors".

I expect Hansen's brand should take that into consideration and prove to be a more responsible company going forward.

Thank you for your time,

Big Asshole
6/13/09

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: info@hansens.com
To: reallybigass@gmail.com
Date: Mon, 15 Jun 2009 12:12:00 -0700
Subject: RE: Online inquiry from Big Asshole8675309||772**||9999999

Thanks for visiting the Hansen’s website.

In November 2007 Hansen’s Beverage Company changed the formula and took out the HFCS. We now sweeten our Natural Soda with Real Sugar. The distributors may still have some of the Hansen’s Soda in stock that contains HFCS. There is still stock left and they will sell those first. The transition is still taking place.

We define our products as Natural because we add NO preservatives and use only natural flavors. We are very proud to have removed the HFCS from our sodas and hope that you and your family will enjoy them for a long time.

Thanks,
Lori @ Hansen’s

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Lori,

I appreciate the response from your company, however I must admit disappointment at the attempt to pass the blame on to the retailer. The reason I find that unacceptable is because the can I am holding in my hand does in fact say "ALL NATURAL" in big lettering that is worked right into the logo type on the packaging. Even if you in fact removed HFCS in 2007, you are still responsible for falsely selling the product as "All Natural."

Now that you are suggesting that Stop and Shop is selling 2 year old soda, I will bring this matter to their attention as well and see if I can't confirm that piece of information. I am convinced that there is time stamping somewhere on this can, such as the H723G 20:31 number stamped on the bottom.

This is a higher concern to me now, as it has been proven that soda does in fact have a shelf life, particularly soda that is packaged in aluminum cans. If what you are saying, that 2 year old soda is being sold - I would very much like to be sure I do not purchase any more of this product. The health risks are not worth it.

Can you help me find the date stamp on the can so that I can have it on hand when I speak to Stop and Shop?

Thank you for your time Lori.

Sincerely,

Big Asshole
6/15/09

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

2009-06-13T22:01:00.010-04:00

Privacy May Be a Victim in Cyberdefense Plan

Only in Worstever

2009-06-13T12:20:00.000-04:00

This dirty-ass ripped up shirt is being given as a prize!?! Where else but in Central Ass is something like this possible?

Gave me an idea though that might be good for traffic. The first 2 people to comment get their pickins' of one of the following:

A. Grade A Distressed T - COMFY!
B. Slightly Worn Boxer Shorts - SO SOFT!

I/IV/V - The Formula for Monotony

2009-06-12T13:20:00.000-04:00

Only in a place like Worstever can shit like this be taken seriously.
Probably why this asshole's attempt at making in Nashville failed horribly. I mean when Elvis and Jerry Lee Lewis first stole this brand of (already aging)music and whitened it up beyond recognition it was an instant suckfest (all pun intended) because their inbred following was too racist to listen to the genuine version they were shamelessly imitating.

40 Fucking Years Later and there are still uncreative morons doing the same exact shit with absolutely NO innovation whatsoever. These dipshits even dress similarly and consider it hip!

Now, over at the Worsteverite gathering bucket, a couple of the Illumisnotty are hot and bothered because the "Worcester's Got Talent" - talent showcase is coming to the prized Hanover Theater in beautiful downtown Wussie (that's the "Urban Core" to all you yuppies).

One metrosexual says, "I've always hoped to see more local talent performing at The Hanover. Not exactly what I had in mind."

Perhaps some shitty 80's cover band, whitey blues project, unremarkable Hootie & the Blowfish sounding pop rock band would better represent Worcester than a presentation of fresh up and coming hopefuls can offer?

Another guy who carved a lucrative business for himself inventing a ketchup and mustard store says the talent show is a, "Sad use of the space and I feel that this shows total lack of creative juice and testicular fortitude on the side of the promoters"

Perhaps he'd prefer a trade show for condiment vendors. Maybe get some Lamplighter Girls on the stage spreading mustard on hot dogs for a couple hours? Maybe some male strippers would be more appropriate to provide the "testicular fortitude" he's looking for.

I for one couldn't give a rat's ass what the Hanover does with the space. Whatever they do, their staff is rude as hell (perhaps because Hanover exploits free volunteers instead of supporting the local economy) and their lineup has yet to be worthy of anything near the admission prices they charge. To me, the Hanover, in and of itself, is just another one those 3rd rate town attempts at imitation - a monumental symbol of all that Wussie will ever be.

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

2009-06-12T13:16:00.002-04:00

Ever wonder why the government started giving out free cell phones to low-income families? Ever look into the company that sponsors this little gem?

http://www.sattel.com/

Doesn't that leave you all warm and HAARPy inside?

visit HAARP to see why your television must now be digital (they need the radio space)

Irish Drinking Fest

2009-06-12T11:05:00.000-04:00

This weekend the Worcester Irish Music Festival kicks off!

I notice that this is the one cultural festival that charges at the door. Perhaps that's too keep the poorer "coloreds" out? Who knows and who cares. To me it's just another night of red drunk people crawling through the cAnal District.

Walmart-High Cost of Low Prices

2009-06-11T23:08:00.012-04:00

Walmart (Sam's Club) received over 1.8 BILLION DOLLARS in SUBSIDIES in this country! This on TOP of Tax Holiday Galore. Your tax dollars are being used to drive out Mom and Pop businesses while exploiting local employees, global manufacturers, and ignorant sheep looking to save a couple of bucks on Fritos.

You're paying the difference in your taxes people. Don't allow YOUR city let these Vampires in!

Watch this movie and see why we don't want Walmart in our neighborhood!

THIS IS ALSO A GREAT MOVIE:
http://www.akillerbargain.com/

And don't think Target is aby different. Read this:
Target: We Train the FBI
http://www.alternet.org/workplace/35610/?comments=view&cID=118628&pID=118609

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

2009-06-11T15:05:00.005-04:00

Ever wonder why the new surge in acne, asthma, cancer, birth defects, low IQs, and constant fatigue?

Thank Monsanto - the chemical warfare company now in charge of America's Agriculture Business

Watch "The World According to Monsanto" linked here:

For more useful knowledge, check this:
The Future of Food

If it Looks Like Shit, Smells Like Shit, Most Likely it is Phish

2009-06-01T17:00:00.008-04:00

There's a rumor that Phish is rehearsing somewhere in Worstever because they couldn't find a cheap enough rehearsal spot in Boston that would let them shoot up and jam on the same 4 chords until 5am.

Some of the local yokels are looking in all the Worstever venues to check to see if the stinky four-piece is poking around.

Seeing as though they are gigging in Boston, it's safe to say there's a chance they are mixing amongst fellow white-trash here in the Wuss, but really - who gives a flying fuck!?!

Well you remember my number one? You know, the guy who complains about cleaning up graffiti and then blogs about how cool Shepard Fairey is, the one and only 4rilla said on the Worstever Site that he recorded some of what sounded like a Phish rehearsal through the closed back door of the DCU Center the other night. I'm excited that someone is so desperate for something to do that they would even search out a band like Phish, let alone tape record a rehearsal through a closed door to share it with other drug addicts.

That's Worstever for you though. Who knows, if these grubby bastards pull a surprise show at Tammany or Ralphs or any other Wussie venue that holds more than 7 people (sorry Dive Bar) - this could be the biggest thing to happen to the feather-haired worsteverites since the Stones used the shitter at Sir Morgan's Cove back at the turn of the century.

Stay tuned for further developments...

not here though, over at poserville

Shitty Council 2

2009-06-01T16:27:00.003-04:00

Shitty Council

2009-06-01T12:19:00.001-04:00

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

2009-05-21T13:57:00.002-04:00

Let's All File Bankruptcy Together

2009-05-21T13:31:00.011-04:00

"People are more loyal to cards that have their kids’ photos on them..."

Fuck the credit card companies. I began boycotting banks last year and so far so good. Cut up your credit and debit cards and start BUYING ONLY WHAT YOU CAN AFFORD! When the bill collectors start calling, tell them you bailed yourself out and invented a new form of currency called CASH. Tell them not to bother calling anymore as you have no intention on ever making a payment. Credit cards are like cell phones - we USED to get along just fine without them - then suddenly no one in the herd can live without them. Cut the chains and start living within your means!

Check out how America's "Cheapest" Family does it. Google it for more information.

More Evidence that Big Government Owns Your Parental Rights

2009-05-19T19:51:00.007-04:00

Arrest ordered for mom of boy, 13, resisting chemo

By AMY FORLITI, Associated Press Writer Amy Forliti, Associated Press Writer 44 mins ago

NEW ULM, Minn. – Authorities sought to arrest the mother of a 13-year-old boy with cancer who refuses chemotherapy after she fled with her son and missed a court hearing Tuesday on his welfare. A judge issued an arrest warrant and ordered that Daniel Hauser be placed in a foster home and be sent for an immediate examination by a pediatric oncologist so he can get treated for Hodgkins lymphoma.

"The court's priority at this point is to try to get Daniel Hauser and get him the care he needs," Brown County District Judge John Rodenberg said.

The cancer is considered highly curable with chemotherapy and radiation, but Daniel quit chemo after a single treatment. With his parents, he opted instead for "alternative medicines," citing religious beliefs. That led authorities to seek custody. Rodenberg last week ruled that Daniel's parents, Colleen and Anthony Hauser, were medically neglecting their son.

The Hausers are Roman Catholic and also believe in the "do no harm" philosophy of the Nemenhah Band, a Missouri-based religious group that believes in natural healing methods advocated by some American Indians.

Colleen Hauser testified earlier that she had been treating his cancer with herbal supplements, vitamins, ionized water and other natural alternatives.

The family was due in court Tuesday to report the results of a chest X-ray and their arrangements for an oncologist. But only Daniel's father appeared. He told Rodenberg he last saw his wife Monday evening.

"She said she was going to leave," Hauser testified. "She said, `That's all you need to know.' And that's all I know."

He said Colleen Hauser left her cell phone at their home in the southern Minnesota town of Sleepy Eye.

Anthony Hauser now agrees that Daniel needs to be taken back to a doctor for re-evaluation for the best treatment, said Calvin Johnson, an attorney for the parents.

The founder of Nemenhah, Philip Cloudpiler Landis, said it was a bad idea for Colleen Hauser to flee with her son.

"She should have gone to court," Landis said. "It's how we work these things out. You don't solve anything by disregarding the order of the judge."

The arrest warrant has been distributed nationwide and a crime alert was being issued to businesses around the country, Brown County Sheriff Rich Hoffman said. He said investigators were following some leads, but declined to elaborate.

The family's doctor, James Joyce, testified by telephone that Daniel's tumor has grown and he needs immediate assessment by a specialist.

Joyce said he examined Daniel on Monday, and an X-ray showed that his tumor had grown to the size it was when he was first diagnosed.

"He had basically gotten back all the trouble he had in January," the doctor said.

Daniel said he had pain on the right side of his chest, which he rated a 10 on a scale of 1 to 10, Joyce said.

Joyce said the pain was around the port that was inserted into Daniel's chest to administer chemotherapy. He attributed the pain to the growing tumor, which is pushing the port out of place.

He said Daniel was at risk of substantial physical harm if no action is taken.

Daniel was accompanied to the appointment with Joyce by his mother and Susan Daya, a California attorney.

Joyce testified that he offered to make appointments for Daniel with oncologists, but the Hausers declined. He also said he tried to give Daniel more information about lymphoma but that the three left in a rush.

"Under Susan Daya's urging, they indicated they had other places to go," Joyce said.

Daya did not immediately return a page left on her cell phone Tuesday by The Associated Press. Her voice mailbox was full. The court also tried to reach her during the hearing, but got no answer.

In his ruling last week, Rodenberg wrote that he would not order chemotherapy if Daniel's prognosis was poor. But if the outlook was good, it appeared chemotherapy and possibly radiation would be in the boy's best interest, he wrote.

Daniel's lymphoma was diagnosed in January, and six rounds of chemotherapy were recommended. Daniel underwent one round in February but stopped after that single treatment. He and his parents sought other opinions, but the doctors agreed with the initial assessment.

State statutes require parents to provide necessary medical care for a child, Rodenberg wrote. The statutes say alternative and complementary health care methods aren't enough.

He also wrote that Daniel, who has a learning disability and cannot read, did not understand the risks and benefits of chemotherapy and didn't believe he was ill.

Daniel testified that he believed the chemo would kill him and told the judge in private testimony unsealed later that if anyone tried to force him to take it, "I'd fight it. I'd punch them and I'd kick them."

Here's a videos of the news story (Can't embed from shitty news source):

Dangerous Chemo Forced Onto Helpless Child

Fun Post Snippet Dujour

2009-05-15T16:35:00.006-04:00

NO GOOD FUCKING LIAR

"CHAINS WE CAN BELIEVE IN"

One Woman's Garbage is Another Woman's New Shirt

2009-05-06T11:02:00.001-04:00

If you have a gigantic pile of shit at your house that you haven't used in like forever, but it's taking up like lots of space, chances are it's due to abnormal brain functioning from a serious mental illness. But why seek help when there are dozens of other people like you right here in the shitty of Worstever willing to trade your useless shit for theirs! Don't reclaim your life form your obsessively materialistic self-made prison of garbage - visit Phunky's Garbage Garden, where your ever-expanding ass can find someone else's trash to put in your home!

Enter the shitty's newest growing trend - the havehertrashery. Lack of creativity and a hunger for the kind of hip that no tiny town like this can muster - take notice of all the yardsales that have become stores around this town. The cAnal district is spewing 'em out, there's a couple new one's on Grafton Street, hell I even heard some are taking this idea to the street - literally! But instead of shopping carts to haul their trash, their tossing it in to renovated trailers and getting "ahtsy" with it.

I suppose this is one way to kill two birds with one stoner though. Instead of complaining about all the litter in the streets and all the abandon commercial retail space in the shitty why not pick up all the trash and stack it in those abandon stores and call it a business! Add some funky paint and voilà ~ entrepreneur manure!

Fun-Post Snippet Dujour: Manufacturing Consent Starts Young

2009-05-05T15:06:00.000-04:00

Much like the way McDonalds and Disney reel your kids into subconscious mind control - here's another way to train 'em young to accept biometric systems for payments. By the time these kids are adults, they'll think this is normal and the move to the electronic RFID chip system will be a warm reminder of their youth...

Economic Downturn = Big Profits for Pharmacies

2009-05-03T10:28:00.003-04:00

I came across a worthy not on some other assholes blog that read, "drug sales in America simply won't be affected in the least by this economic downturn."

This is because as the economic downturn destroys the average person's sanity, the "need" for anti-anxiety meds, blood-pressure meds, etc, etc will be on the rise. Now, with mandatory, federalized healthcare in place - everyone and anyone in our society, no matter how poor, will be given access to these "medications." It's all part of the Soma solution - a drug oriented society.

Click here to get some free information that will forever change the way you look at psychotropic drugs...

Good Perspectives on Swine Flu Hoax

2009-05-03T09:03:00.007-04:00

Swine Flu Dub

2009-05-01T16:39:00.002-04:00

Fun-Post Snippet Dujour: Manufacturing Disease and Using Fear to Work Toward Martial Law

2009-05-01T12:51:00.004-04:00

FOX News getting you prepped for the purpose behind the curtain:

Fun-Post Snippet Dujour: Manufacturing Disease and Using Fear to Push Drugs

2009-04-30T23:06:00.002-04:00

As if you didn't see this coming:
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=103593687

Here comes the mandatory vaccinations again that actually kill more people than the disease does! I'm sure Walgreen's and Target will have them in store soon.

Too bad the media keeps leaving out the fact that more people have died this month from tuberculosis. Why is that not a pandemic you ask? Well, because we're already vaccinating for it! We need new drugs! Forget about the fact that the number of deaths from the regular influenza vaccine in 2005 was 1,812 and let's keep forgetting the irony that the Obama campaign ranked at the top of contributions received from the pharmaceutical , entertainment, banking, computer, health care, investment and Internet industries.

Hmmm...I wonder now that Homeland Security has control of these medical emergencies, a threat of any kind of outbreak = Martial Law and Fema camps

further suggested reading

edit*
This propaganda gem in 1976 led to over 4,000 people paralyzed or otherwise severely damaged. The injuries caused by the vaccine proved to be more dangerous than those of the actual virus it was supposed to protect them from.

thanks to Harry for the info

READ THIS for more evidence that the Center for Disease Control played a role in the manufacturing of this "swine flu."

Fun-Post Snippet Dujour: Brainwashing the Children

2009-04-30T11:08:00.008-04:00

Just when you thought propaganda couldn't become any more evident:

Thank God for FEMA. No mention in the coloring book that 9/11 was an inside job modeled much like Operation Northwoods, and no pages to color about dealing with a criminal government on the verge of martial law either.

Now if only the government would administer coloring books with a disastrous pandemic theme to help scare the kiddies into washing their hands and keeping a healthy distance from their Mexican classmates -we'd be all set!

The Unemployment Conundrum

2009-04-24T10:54:00.030-04:00

"Because we are now experiencing an unusual high volume of calls, we are not able to assist you. Please try your call later, or on the next business day."

Does anything make you want to scream the word CUNT more than that message?

For those of you fortunate enough NOT to know what this is referring to, it's the ostanato of the "customer service" phone extension to the Massascrewedshit's Unemployment number.

After making these calls for a shameful amount of time now, it's safe for me to assume that "An unusual high volume of calls" is actually quite fucking usual after all. That being said, one can only wonder why the fuck the state doesn't simply hire enough help to answer the goddamn phone. Perhaps the idea of using robots to do these jobs instead of human beings is just too ironic for the sandwich stuffing bureaucrats to notice. I mean, maybe hiring some decent human beings at Unemployment and killing two birds with one stone would be just too damn efficient for any state agency!

On that note, I for one believe there should be a yearly firing and rehiring of the dolts who actually do "work" at this office. I came to this conclusion a few months back, when my unemployment ran out and I was forced to call and speak to a live person to file for an extension. Here's EXACTLY how the dialogue went:

(after waiting for over 45 minutes)

Cunty Operator: Name and social security number please?

BA: Hi, my name is _____ and my social is xxx-xx-xxxx. I was just calling because

Cunty Operator: Pin Number?

BA: uh, xxxx. The reason I am

CO: I need you to verify your address please.

BA: Okay, it's ______ I wanted to apply for the

CO: I can see your last check was mailed out on x/x/xx is that correct?

BA: That sounds about right, I

CO: Okay and what's the reason for your call today?

BA: Well, I called last week multiple times and held for a very long time to no avail trying to get an extention on my unemployment. When I finally got through to a representative, he took my information and advised me that I was all set and that I would be receiving the extension. However, when I tried to make my claim online earlier this week, I received a message stating that I needed to call to set-up the extension with a representative. Like I said, I thought this was taken care of, so I

CO: Please hold

(after waiting 15 more minutes)

New Cunty Operator: Name and social security number please?

BA: Uh, excuse me before I go through all that again, I was just blindly transferred to you and I already gave all this information to the last operator I was just speaking w

NCO: (heavy sigh into receiver) I can't help you unless I can bring up your file. I need your social security number please.

BA: My name is _____ and my social is xxx-xx-xxxx. My address is ______. The date of my last check wa

NCO: Thank you. How can I help you?

BA: AS I ALREADY TOOK THE TIME TO EXPLAIN ONCE ALREADY, I called last week and spoke to

NCO: Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to calm down

BA: (very softly) Listen, I am calling to request the extension for my unemployment claim. I

NCO: Okay, is all your information still current?

BA: uh huh

NCO: And you are still unemployed, correct?

BA: exactly

NCO: (sound of typing in background) Oh, I see. Now it shows here that you are returning to school, is that correct?

BA: Yes, last week I informed the rep who answered the phone that

NCO: The who?

BA: The representative that answered the phone when I called - sorry I didn't get his name - but yes I explained to him that I was returning to school to

NCO: Well, I'm afraid this will delay your unemployment because we're going to have to investigate to see if you are still eligible to

BA: Woah, woah, woah - wait a minute. The last guy I spoke to said that Unemployment might actually help me pay for school if I'm going to

NCO: Sir, I've already had to ask you to calm down once sir.

BA: Well, I'm sorry but this is frustrating. I'm going to school to further my education to help me better my chances of landing a meaningful job - you know get off unemployment! I don't see how

NCO: Sir, in order to be eligible for unemployment, you have to be diligently searching for work. If you are in school, how can be looking for work?

BA: I am planning on going to classes AT NIGHT and I assure you that this will only better my

NCO: Sir, do I have to hang up on you?

BA: What? Wh - Can I please speak to your manager?

NCO: Sir, our manager does not talk to irate callers. Now either you can calm down and let me help you, or I can hang up on you and not help you?

BA: Can I please have your name?

NCO: Not with that attitude you can't!

BA: (now very calm) Listen, I'm sorry I am getting frustrated as hell because

NCO: I'm going to have to ask you not to curse

BA: (sarcastically calm now) Sorry. I am very frustrated at the lack of service that I am getting here. I worked for many years in customer service and

NCO: Well sir, you are not working in it now

BA: Well maybe I should be! Maybe you guys ought to hire some help around there since you are obviously overworked and

NCO: Why don't you write a letter to the governor and tell HIM that!

BA: Wow, I can't believe that you would say that to me. So much for the "customer is always

NCO: You're yelling at m

BA: Listen, I have a family to feed and I am only asking for some sense of urgency with my situati

NCO: Sir, you are one in a million calls that we get every day. Everyone has a family to feed. What makes you feel so entitled that

BA: I'm sorry, this is appalling. Can I please just speak to your supervisor?

NCO: I've already told you that's not going to happen. Now listen I can go ahead and process this for you and take care of it. Is there anything else I can do for you?

BA: So, now you ARE going to help me?

NCO: Sir, you're the one who called here irate and

BA: What about the school issue?

NCO: Sir, as I said, I will take care of this and get it processed, you should begin receiving checks again in the next two weeks.

BA: (doubtfully) Amazing. Can I please have your name so that I know who helped me with this so

NCO: Why, so you can complain about me? I'm sorry but

BA: How will I follow-up if I don't even know who helped me?

NCO: You can just call back the main number and

BA: But part of the reason I

NCO: Is there anything else I can help you with?

BA: I guess not, but

NCO: (Big smile in voice) Thank you for calling, have a great day.

Fun Post Snippet Du-Jour

2009-04-24T09:18:00.010-04:00

New collections court gives a judge the power to order debtors arrested! Read the article here:

Pissed off Former Democrat- ADAP2K: new collections court

All I Want For Christmas

2009-04-23T08:28:00.010-04:00

Roaster Boy Posted This and I Just Had to Share:

PediSedate is a medical device consisting of a colorful, toy-like headset that connects to a game component such as the Nintendo Game Boy system or a portable CD player. Once the child places it on his or her head and swings the snorkel down from its resting place atop the head, PediSedate transparently monitors respiratory function and distributes nitrous oxide, an anesthetic gas. The child comfortably becomes sedated while playing with a Nintendo Game Boy system or listening to music. This dramatically improves the hospital or dental experience for the child, parents and healthcare providers.

The result is a system that provides a calming influence over the children, monitors the child continuously, allows the procedure to be performed by less skilled personnel, increases the speed with which procedures can be performed and makes the procedure a less stressful experience for all involved. Each headset can be used multiple times per day by replacing the disposable components contained in the disposable kit.

PediSedate consists of a state of the art anesthesia administration and monitoring system. A pulse-oximeter within the headset, monitors oxygenation and a capnometer monitors second-to-second respiratory rate ensuring the safety of the patient. This currently is not the standard of care in outpatient settings. The PediSedate anesthesia delivery system delivers Nitrous Oxide and other volatile agents via a patented anesthesia delivery/scavenging mask situated in the snorkel. Inhalation anesthesia is both painless and titrateable. The benefits of volatile anesthetics are that onset and recovery times are rapid, which reduces cost to the healthcare system.

Text Taken Directly from the PediSedate Website

Now if I owned this device I could finally get into gaming! Maybe even start voting again...

Summer (Mullet) Nationals Staying Wussie for One More Year

2009-04-22T10:20:00.011-04:00

Paulie's Point of View: Summah Nationals Staying Put in WooTown for One More Year!

The Summer Nationals are when the best mullets are in season and as far as photogenic experiences for the city of wustah, this one event is truly the creme de la creme for any photographer on the prowl of trashy pics.

I for one, can't wait - bad press or not, the very ethos of wustah is at it's peak during this event. Aside from the obvious economic importance of the event, worstever's ethos is important enough to desire the summer nationals stay here where they belong...

Get The Lube Ready!

2009-04-18T01:03:00.008-04:00

With the best in local [unpaid for] music coming up in the cAnal District, there'll be plenty of drunken milk-feds filling Kelly Square very soon.

According to Worstever Magazine, last year was a huge success. That's of course, only if you count booze sales. As for the musicians providing the entertainment - well they just get the exposure! I'm realizing that nobody plays music for money around here, after all - why painstakingly study music if not to play in a crowded room of drunken college post-teens?

Maybe that's why real musicianship is so hard to come by here - because the professionals are forced to go play in cities that will pay.

Let me guess, the turtle being anally raped represents the musicians and the young boy getting his represents the cAnal district club owners?

10 Random Things to Love About Worstever

2009-04-17T23:30:00.000-04:00

pic link

1. Rolling Stones played at a venue in Worcester in 1981 (never to return)
- This is the wussterite's favorite claim to fame. It is written about often in the local shit papers to this day!

2. Most abandon warehouse/factory population per square mile in the United States
- Nothing sores up the old eye like a glimpse of the shitty skyline from 290. Dirty brown piles of bricks everywhere. They either get turned into un-rented luxury lofts, or sit and rot until they become large fires.

3. Cover bands, cover bands, powerchord pop, cover bands, cover bands
- Bullshit worcester "promoters" even hire them to play worsty's so called "big" venues like the Palladium and the hillbillies go apeshit for it!

4. Police Officers instead of Bouncers at the bars*
-elbow to elbow with drunken whiteboys in Red Sox hats = fight every night

5. Redevelopment and total uprooting of Downtown (that's "Urban Core" for all you Yuppies) every few years.
- from the Galleria, to the Fashion Outlets, to the hope and dream of Banana Republic keep your eyes and ears open for the newest destruction/rebuilding of worstever's downtown shithole.

6. There are 10 "fallback" colleges
- So, you can't afford NYC? Don't have the grades for Boston or Providence? Come to the Worst and find out why no one really needs all that cultural diversity anyways! Anna Maria College, Assumption College, Becker College, Clark University, Cummings School of Veterinary Medicine, Nichols College, Quinsigamond Community College, UMass Medical School, Worcester State College, Worcester Polytechnic Institute - with colleges like these, who needs a top rate ejucashun?

7. The White Blues Phenomenon
- Here in the wuss, we like our blues like we like our chocolate (and everything else) - WHITE and watery. That's why you can hear White People Playing the Blues somewhere in the town at any given moment. If it ain't blues, it's Third Eye Blind/Counting Crows/Matchbox 20/My lumpy left nut sounding pop garbage that they call "power-pop" for some reason. (Maybe cause it makes you want to pop the power off those speakers as soon as the music starts?)

(Not meant to discount the really cheesy white boy rap phenomenon also popular here )

8. City fondly cherishes a statue of a young boy fucking a turtle so much that they proudly hail it a mascot
- nobody who lives in the wuss can tell you what the statue is supposed to symbolize, but no one can deny it's mystique.

9. Train Station, Bus Depot, Airport and anyplace else not pumping liquor always have a genuine ghost town appeal

10. Knowing, with precision, how to turn away fame and fortune

Wormtown Taxi: Selling the House

2009-04-17T17:01:00.000-04:00

Jeff posted this on the Wormtown Taxi

(If you're not familiar with Jeff, he's the guy driving a cab around town with his head out the window like a German Shepard - taking pictures with his cell phone, getting his blog on, AND delivering commuters, all at the same time.)

I thought it was thought provoking so I tried to comment, but he's playing comment Nazi now in an effort to boycott your humble narrator so I'll add my two pennies here since I know for a fact he snoops here anyway...

Regarding that house for sale on West Boylston Street opposite the Stop and Shop parking lot that's in between a new commercial edifice being constructed next door to the right, and the new Walgreens next door to the left; the construction will probably be another pharmacy if there's one on the other side of the house. Thousand bucks says it's that or a Sovereign/Skank of America...

The back story on that house is allegorical I'm sure. A microcosmic look into the American life and the McDonaldization of American (soon global) culture (or degeneration of)

- B.A. year of our Ford 632

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

2009-04-11T12:44:00.008-04:00

LOOK UP IN THE SKY AT SUNSET
Allergy season is here again! Run out and get your Claritin (now available in chewable grape flavor for kids of all ages)

Worcester, MA - First Rate City (for Medical Errors and Hospital Accidents)

2009-04-10T16:51:00.006-04:00

Worstever's Making All the Lists This Week!

Just another great reason this shitty stands out...

2009-04-10T15:33:00.000-04:00

'Jew Gotta See This

2009-04-09T13:31:00.008-04:00

Pretty Funny Stuff Right Here

photo by Paul Shoul

World Class Acts in Worstever

2009-04-09T09:59:00.008-04:00

Worcester's impersonation of the Village Voice posted this video on their blog this morning and commented that they viewed it as a "pretty classy" move:

Wow. If a shamelessly insincere 2 minutes worth of stumbling through an apology isn't classy, I don't know what is! Even if he batters the pronunciation of the village name. I mean, talk about class act - check out that t-shirt! It's got his own name on it AND this morning's Bloody Mary. Here's to you Andrew W.K. - whoever the fuck you are...

TALES FROM THE SHITTY

Now Who Will Buy My Postcards?

This Is Worcester Massachusetts

Worcester Massachusetts a Great Place To Have Your Kids Shot At

Platinum Premier - Let's Meet at the Place You Get Beat for Beatin' Your Meat

Reminds Me of Some Folks I Know

Watching Worstever Magazine Jerk Itself Off

Funny Because It's True

KEEPING WORCESTER IN THE DARK

Strangers With CANDI

More on Worcester Zoning Corruption

The Fraud of "Transparency" in the Government - How the Freedom of Information Act Only Works Against You

1-800 Eat My Ass

Of Course She's Smiling

For Lease

The Real

User Friendly Receptacles of Shit

Face it Worsta

Anonymity Itches the Ass of Ranting Randell Again

The New Wustah Zubaz Pant

Drug'em Up

Postcards From Worchester

It Ain't Funny

Massachusetts Department of Correction's Murder Psychiatric Patient

Mass May Test New Tolling Within Months

Worcester, MA - A Place On the Move!

The Village of Peedmont

Get Up, A Get Get Get Down - 911 is a Joke in Wortown

Freedom is Doing What Your Told!

Why Worcester is Really Number 1

Ask You Doctor if Dystonia is Right for You

and I quote:

Your Bill of Rights

Think For Yourself

HR 2749 the Seizure of the US food supply and production passed the House

Please tell everyone who wants organic foods.....

Recommended Reading

40z n' Bluntz

World Health Organization Accused of Mass Murder

END MONSANTO!

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour - Manufacturing Fear to Push Drugs Cont.

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour - Pop Goes The Propaganda

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour - Revelations Made Easy

Vernon Hill Park - Site Improvements Need to Dig Deeper

The Rules of Engagement

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

They All Want The Big Asshole

Celebrate The Hate

What's Wrong With Us

Much Needed Levity

Collyer Bluff

Leprechaun In The Hood

It's Hip to Be Square

Satan's Getting His Fuck On Tonight!

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour - IDIOT POLITICIANS MEET IDIOT-RUN NEWSPAPER

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

Juxtaposed 2: Difference Between Emerican'ts and the Rest of the World

Juxtaposed 1: Difference Between Appreciation of Mother's and Father's

The Omnivore's Dilemma

Truly Representative of a Shit Town

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

The Drugging of the Children

The Healing of The Nation

Falsely Advertised Products: Hansen's All Natural Soda

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

Privacy May Be a Victim in Cyberdefense Plan

Only in Worstever

I/IV/V - The Formula for Monotony

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

Irish Drinking Fest

Walmart-High Cost of Low Prices

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

If it Looks Like Shit, Smells Like Shit, Most Likely it is Phish

Shitty Council 2

Shitty Council

Fun Post Snippet Du Jour

Let's All File Bankruptcy Together

More Evidence that Big Government Owns Your Parental Rights

Fun Post Snippet Dujour

One Woman's Garbage is Another Woman's New Shirt